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    Could Glitter Beards Be The New U.S. Presidential Campaign Trend?

    With increasing reports of hipsters adding glitter to their ample facial hair, we wanted to see what our U.S. presidential candidates would look like if they adopted the fad.

    You've already seen what the candidates for President of the United States would look like with beards. Now I'm ratcheting things up a notch after reading headlines like Hipsters 'glitter bombing' their beards (USA Today), This Christmas, Men Are Glitter-Bombing Their Beards (Slate), American masculinity is on its glittery deathbed (New York Post), and This New Beard Trend Is Gonna Make You Wanna Die Inside (BuzzFeed). No need to get suicidal, folks, just allow your sense of humor to become your lifesaver. I hereby present for your satisfaction an artist's rendering of what the U.S. presidential candidates would look like, if they were wearing glitter beards.

    Ben Carson

    John Pemble

    Speaking in Des Moines Iowa during the annual Lincoln Dinner, Republican presidential candidate Doctor Carson says while he doesn'€™t have experience as an elected official, there are different ways to gain necessary experience, plus he would be the first black president to wear a glitter beard. 5/16/2015 Photo by John Pemble

    Hillary Clinton

    Lefteris Pitarakis / AP

    Former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton laughs as she arrives for an event at Chatham House in London, Friday, Oct. 11, 2013. Clinton is to be presented with the institute'€™s annual award in recognition of her contribution to the significant improvement of international relations, to which she credits her ability to leave her peers stunned, speechless, and docile. "I'm not sure exactly what it is about me that facilitates negotiations, but I find nobody is willing to stand up to me lately and I pretty much always get what I want." (AP Photo/Lefteris Pitarakis)

    Ted Cruz

    "I don't care what the polls say," Ted Cruz was overhead saying as he arrived for a recent debate. "I know what the people want, and they want the facts delivered plain and straight without commentary from an out of control, liberal media. They also want purple glitter beards."

    Bernie Sanders

    Carolyn Kaster / AP

    Sen. Bernie Sanders, I-Vt., smiles as he is asked about running for president during a news conference on Capitol Hill in Washington, Wednesday, April 29, 2015. "We're going to turn this country as blue as my beard!" he shouted to his enthusiastic followers. Sanders, an independent who describes himself as a "democratic socialist who is attracted to anything shiny," will follow a statement with a major campaign kickoff in his home state in several weeks. Two people familiar with his announcement spoke to The Associated Press under condition of anonymity to describe internal planning and grooming. (AP Photo/Carolyn Kaster)

    Chris Christie

    New Jersey governor Chris Christie is barely hanging on in the polls but has succeeded in remaining in the TV debate schedule, for now. He describes the conversation he had with CNN. "I spoke with them and they didn't want to let me in, but then I asked them 'Did I tell you I've got a violet colored glitter beard now?' The next thing I knew, I was in the lineup."

    Rand Paul

    Darren Mccollester / Getty Images

    Candidate Rand Paul has been struggling in the polls lately. "With Trump saying crazy stuff every day it has been difficult for the rest of us to get noticed, let alone focus on serious policy matters." Paul said. "I've decided to fight fire with fire. You want crazy? I'll give you crazy. We have a statement coming out Tuesday that is going to put us in the news cycle for days." Paul had no comment to make regarding his new metallic gold glitter beard.

    Carly Fiorina

    Asked about the pink glitter beard she had been sporting lately, U.S. presidential candidate Carly Fiorina responded "It may still be a man's world, but that doesn't mean a woman can't succeed on her own terms." She continued, "That's why I embrace the strength of my femininity and chose a pink beard instead of a more masculine blue or green."

    Jeb Bush

    Jeb Bush's campaign has been struggling to connect with any group beyond the "Key wealthy donors in favor of a third Bush presidency" demographic and as a result has veered toward courting the youth vote. "Hipsters respond to authenticity," Bush was overheard saying. "Bernie's beard is so obviously fake. You can tell it was just glued on. This thing is super real," he said, giving his beard a tug and dislodging a few blue glitter flakes. "Plus the youth in this country love snow cones, so I think between the beard and this tie I've got the youth vote locked up."

    Marco Rubio

    John Locher / AP

    Republican presidential candidate Sen. Marco Rubio, R-Fla., speaks with the media after touring the World Famous Gold & Silver Pawn shop with owner Rick Harrison, Thursday, May 28, 2015, in Las Vegas. The shop is featured in the television show Pawn Stars. "You might think I bought this thing in the pawn shop," he said, "But no, it's totally legit. I've been working on growing it for a year, at least." In response to a question from a concerned onlooker he said "No, the glue that holds on the glitter says 'inflammable' on the tube, so there's no danger." (AP Photo/John Locher)

    Donald Trump

    Jewel Samad / AFP / Getty Images

    Donald Trump remains ahead in the Republican polls, and it's easy to see why. Republican states are shown in red on political maps, red is a power color, and Trump is not shy about being bold. "It took a few tries to get things right," the candidate said. "People have always fixated on my hair, but I wanted people to listen to what I was saying, so I grew a beard to get them to look at my lips. That wasn't enough, so I got together with my campaign managers, and they told me to put out some well rounded policy statements, focus on the issues, and maybe read some history." He continued, "Those are all good ideas, and we're going to work on those things, but I told my advisors 'Look guys, ultimately I'm responsible here, I have to call the shots, so we're going with the red glitter beard.'"

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