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26 Fucking Funny Twitter Jokes From This Month That Got Over 50K Retweets

"I keep subtitles on when watching Netflix cause my fat-ass can't hear what's going on over the munching of snacks."

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4.

My daughter just tried pizza for the first time.

6.

professional comedian: [genuine funny joke with context and a punchline] me: .. ok twitter user: we need a disney princess with a yeast infection me: https://t.co/mWbwWCQ9BP

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My degree and I waiting to see who will finish who first

15.

Me getting ready to go out with friends because I promised them I'd go but I really don't feel like it

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20.

I GOT MY DOG A LIFE JACKET AND SHE FORGOT HOW TO BE A DOG

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26.

i told this dude my name was Veronika with a K but when i looked at his phone he put me under Keronica....