11 Things That Definitely Don't Suck About Being Single

Fact: Not only do long-term relationships suck, but they are also the root of all evil.

1. You've got that gorgeous bed all to yourself.

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Sleep in the center, stretch out, and thank the universe that no one is pulling the sheets off of you.

2. Ladies: Let the hair grow free.

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Armpits too, gurl.

3. Your schedule, your rules.

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Feel like chilling with your donkey friend on the couch? DO IT.

4. And you don't have to pretend to like people you couldn't care less about.

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You no longer have to force a smile around your significant other's friends. Let that face be free!

5. Making out with randos is one of life's greatest joys.

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6. You can be as indecisive about dinner as you want.

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You can feel free to overthink minuscule decisions like dinner and which shoes to wear because there is NO ONE BREATHING DOWN YOUR NECK.

7. NO VALENTINE'S DAY.

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Valentine's Day is for suckers: over-commercialized and forcibly romantic. WHAT IS WORSE? Nothing.

8. Meeting the parents is actually excruciating.

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The only thing worse than making small talk with people you hate is marrying into their horrific family.

9. Having dinner for one actually feels amazing.

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Bring a book, sit at the bar, and watch as everyone realizes you are a badass and that they are not worthy. Also you will get hit on.

10. No one will ever dare suggest that you shower WITH THEM.

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"The only person invited into MY shower is my loufa, my adjustable massaging showerhead, and a perfectly curated shower playlist."

11. Loving yourself is legit the most important thing ever.

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Nothing feels better.

Relationships suck. #KeepOnSucking on Jolly Rancher!

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