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Are You The Worst Person In The World?

Cool story, bro.

Posted on
  1. Check all that apply.

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    I refer to champagne exclusively as "champs."
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    I laugh openly at the pain of others.
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    I would like to tell you about the dream I had last night.
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    I have said, "Excuse me, do you have any Grey Poupon?" as a joke.
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    I own more than 17 fedoras and/or bucket hats.
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    I quote "Family Guy" more than once per day.
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    I quote the movie "Anchorman" at least three times per day.
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    I relate to the character Ross from "Friends" more than any other fictional character.
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    I live in an apartment with neighbors below me and I love stomping around in boots pretty much all the time.
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    I'm pretty sure I'm smarter than most people.
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    I have intentionally created a "man cave" in my home and refer to it openly as a "man cave."
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    I like to walk up a busy staircase and stop in the middle for no reason.
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    I go into soup stores at lunchtime and sample every flavor of soup before making a decision.
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    When it comes to dating, I "don't like labels."
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    I have a link to a TED Talk I think you'd enjoy.
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    I like to refer to Sunday as "Sunday Funday."
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    I would eat a baby if I had the right opportunity.
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    I'm known for the extravagant voicemails I leave.
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    I get a thrill out of correcting the grammar and spelling of others online.
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    I like to randomly scream.
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    If you're eating a food I don't like, you're gonna hear about it!
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    It pains me to listen to music from any other source than vinyl.
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    I often start sentences with "No offense, but…"
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    You just never know when I'm going to whip out an apple and bite right into it.
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    When someone says something boring, you know I'm following it up with a "cool story, bro."
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    I end all my text messages with a period.
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    I will pull out an acoustic guitar and start playing "Wonderwall" at any moment.
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    I have some great stories from my college study abroad program I'd like to share with you.
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    If there's a really long line, I will find a way to discretely cut. It's called being strategic.
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    I'm never not chewing gum.
 
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