Should You Leave A Voicemail?

Hmm… Are you the president?

  1. Check all that apply
    1. I have urgent information I need to communicate.
    2. It’s really important.
    3. I understand the dictionary definition of “important.”
    4. I’m willing to take a written test to prove it.
    5. The person I’m calling is over the age of 50.
    6. I’m going to leave my message in the form of a song.
    7. For me, voicemails are a type of performance art.
    8. The person I’m calling has no way of accessing email or text and the “missed call” function on their phone is broken.
    9. I’m calling a landline.
    10. The person I’m calling has explicitly said “I love voicemails.”
    11. The person I’m calling has explicitly said “Please leave me a voicemail. It will really make my day.”
    12. I was not holding a gun to that person’s head.
    13. The person I’m calling enjoys the ritual of entering a passcode and patiently listening.
    14. I have a really sexy voice.
    15. I’m a very successful voiceover actor and the sound of my voice is in high demand.
    16. I promise not to breathe into the phone.
    17. I’m a time traveler from 30 years ago and I don’t know any better.
    18. The person I’m calling is a supernatural creature that feeds on voicemails to gain life energy.
    19. The person I’m calling was kidnapped and leaving a voicemail was part of the crucial instructions of their captors.
    20. I measure my own self worth with the quality of my voicemails. It’s all I have.

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