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What The Hell Was With All The Waffles On "Gossip Girl"?

The "scandalous lives of Manhattan's elite" involve nothing but constantly eating waffles. Was Big Waffle pulling the strings? Here are all the show's waffles in chronological order.

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In Episode 2, Rufus makes his thesis statement as a character.

His only purpose as a sad, washed-up musician dad was to make waffles.
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His only purpose as a sad, washed-up musician dad was to make waffles.

Even Vanessa, the worst character ever, can sense the constant presence of waffles.

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Dan and Jenny's absentee mother at least knows that these children eat waffles for every meal.

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What are they eating? Oh, waffles.

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Here's a closeup of the Waffle King himself, about to eat a bite of delicious waffle.

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It's Christmas morning and the siblings Humphrey are salivating over their daily allotment of waffles.

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Oooh hot waffle!

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Poor Rufus slaving away at literally the only thing he knows how to do.

Dan feeds his growing waffle addiction as his waffle enabler looks on in delight.

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Sometimes waffle consumption is a tense affair.

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What would you like for breakfast? LOL like you have a choice.

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Nice shirt, Rufus. Look out behind you!

Rufus spending some alone time with his many waffles.

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Oh, is it waffle o'clock again?

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Dan stuffing his mouth hole with the only thing he knows how to put in there.

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Waffles acting as more of a parent than Rufus ever will.

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Dan begins to start panicking when he finds himself in a no-waffles situation.

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Sometimes it helps to share the pain of your waffle-based diet with a friend.

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Jenny sends out a cry for help, but the waffle madness is FAR from over.

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Eric naively admires Rufus' waffle iron.

Finally, Eric will get to eat the first of millions of waffles.
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Finally, Eric will get to eat the first of millions of waffles.

By Season 3, Dan finally fulfills his destiny.

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Waffle eater becomes waffle maker.

Even Chuck Bass gets in on the waffle action.

While Dan was making waffles in Brooklyn, his dad was ALSO making waffles on the Upper East Side, their waffle cycles fully synced.
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While Dan was making waffles in Brooklyn, his dad was ALSO making waffles on the Upper East Side, their waffle cycles fully synced.

But then Rufus got confused and made the wrong thing.

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RUFUS, WHAT DID YOU DO?

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Thank god, the waffles returned!

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Jenny is prone to revealing family secrets.

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SPOTTED...

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Waffles were used in emotional warfare.

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Not even Nate Archibald was safe from the waffle epidemic.

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The Upper East Side's appetite for waffles cannot be satisfied!

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Jenny's rebellious stage includes rebelling against waffles.

Eating waffles for every meal starts to take its toll.
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Eating waffles for every meal starts to take its toll.

But Rufus starts to realize that waffle-based parenting is not super effective.

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And he reaches a moment of clarity in his waffle-induced madness.

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If anyone eats anything other than a waffle, it raises a red flag.

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No one on Gossip Girl was ever more than five feet away from a waffle at any given time.

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Jenny remains scarred for life from the constant stream of waffles.

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But Nate will not tolerate any disrespect toward the sacred waffles.

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He has undergone full waffle indoctrination.

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Rufus just keeps making waffles. He cannot stop. Even if he wanted to (which he does not).

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Because the insane demand for waffles never ends.

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Rufus never goes anywhere without a plate of his trusty waffles.

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Dan proves he cannot function without his precious waffles.

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But sometimes he's forced to make the hardest decisions of his life.

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But it's OK because there are always 10,000 more waffles around the corner.

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Every corner.

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And when William Van Der Woodsen tries to take Rufus' place, the first thing he takes is his waffles.

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But Rufus only has ONE job and he does it so well.

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Not even Blair Waldorf is free of waffle dialogue.

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CHECK OUT THIS WAFFLE SHOT

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Rufus starts a journey of self reflection and doesn't like what he sees.

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Day in, day out, Rufus replenishes the waffle supply, never letting it run dry.

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Quintessential Rufus: sitting alone in Brooklyn next to a plate of waffles, sadly strumming his guitar.

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In the last season, as Ivy unpacks Rufus' things as he moves back into his loft, the waffle iron returns home.

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Ciaran Griffin / Getty Images

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