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What Coconut Water Really Tastes Like

Are you absolutely sure we're meant to drink this?

Coconut water tastes like:

1. Sour water

2. Messed up water

3. Fermented water

4. Expired milk

5. Expired water

6. A coconut but something's wrong with it?

7. Water but something's wrong with it?

8. Donkey urine

9. Dog urine

10. Cat urine

11. Human urine

12. Maybe a horse's urine mixed with a zebra's urine?

13. Like someone peed in a coconut

14. Like someone cried into a coconut and then you found that congealed liquid 10 years later

15. Like someone whispered a curse into a coconut and it became a drink

16. The pools of water that gather on a dead animal after a gentle rain

17. The fluid inside a glowstick

18. Like someone squeezed water out of a ferret

19. Like someone sprayed a hose on Shia LaBeouf and then squeezed the water out of his ponytail

20. Like someone filtered water through Benjamin Franklin's grave

21. Like a random man sneezed into a coconut and then you had to drink it

22. Cheese-flavored water

23. Like water filtered through the seats of a taxi cab on a hot day

24. Like a big, burly man chopped down a tree, sensually removed his tank top, rang out the sweat, and then served it to you as a beverage

25. The liquid that forms on top of yogurt

26. The floor of a gym

27. A tangy mistake

28. The water in a swimming pool full of sweaty children

29. A melted goat

30. The spit inside a French horn

31. The spit inside a trombone

32. The spit inside a clarinet

33. A violin that someone spit on

34. Water that you can't totally see through

35. Maybe the coconut's own pee???