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    41 Things You Can't Prove Aren't Caused By Vaccines

    How much do we REALLY know about vaccines anyway?

    You can't prove vaccines don't cause:

    1. The ability to talk to dogs

    2. The ability to talk to cats

    3. The ability to shoot lasers from your eyes

    4. The ability to shoot lasers from your fingers

    5. The ability to stop lasers from shooting out of someone else's eyes or fingers

    6. The ability to melt into a puddle like Alex Mack

    7. The ability to turn puddles into Alex Mack

    8. Extreme gluten tolerance

    9. Banana fingers

    10. Pregnancy

    11. Alien pregnancy

    12. Measles

    13. The power of flight

    14. Growing a durable turtle shell

    15. Luxurious, flowing hair

    16. Really strong bones and teeth

    17. A healthy respect for the creatures of the sea

    18. Suddenly being really good at basketball

    19. Suddenly being really bad at basketball

    20. Having a series of basketball-themed nightmares

    21. The ability to turn stuffed animals into sentient beings

    22. Mumps

    23. Sporadic, uncontrollable time travel

    24. Sporadic, uncontrollable break dancing

    25. The creation of a clone with all your child's memories that you aren't able to distinguish from your child

    26. The ability to make that noise that whales make

    27. Trombone fingers

    28. Hepatitis

    29. Becoming a hologram

    30. Becoming a witch

    31. Becoming a witch hologram

    32. Becoming a ball of pure energy and light

    33. Rubella

    34. Having little dinner mints come out your nose

    35. Snake fingers

    36. Farts replaced by the song "Breakfast at Tiffany's"

    37. Having the voice of an angel

    38. Having the voice of a demon

    39. Diptheria

    40. Throwing up cotton candy

    41. The ability to see dead people