The Beard Liberation Front has unveiled the shortlist for the 2013 Parliamentary Beard of the Year.
The competition, which is open to beard wearers from both the House of Commons and the House of Lords, is one of the most important awards of the parliamentary year.
The award is designed to highlight politicians “who have given beards a positive image in the public eye during the year”.
Keith Flett, the organisation’s spokesman, told BuzzFeed that they’re taking measures to stop the beard competition being politicised.
We’re thinking about running a vote but are worried people will be voting for party political reasons.
It’s not about parties, it’s about beards.
And he’s furious about the Prime Minister’s approach to facial hair.
Yesterday Cameron said he couldn’t even grow a moustache - I don’t think that’s strictly true, I think it’s that he couldn’t be arsed.
Here’s the 10 nominees for Parliamentary Beard of the Year.
2. Jeremy Corbyn MP, Labour.
The left-wing member for Islington North postively bristles with anger at the government’s policies. Corbyn has the beard to beat as a FOUR TIMES winner of the award.
Flett tells us: “The reason Jeremy wins is that he occasionally speaks up on hirsute matters in parlaiment - he is very pro-beard. There are some serious issues that appear from time-to-time.”
7. Dr Julian Huppert, Liberal Democrat.
University lecturer. One of the few people in the Commons who has a clue about science. Supporter of real ale pubs. We’d be dissapointed if the MP for Cambridge didn’t have facial hair.
Flett tells us: “The Lib Dems have got the rising star of hirsuteness in Julian Huppert - it’s a very modern, almost hipster beard.”
8. John Randall MP, Conservative.
The only Tory on the list, Randall is a no-nonsence rugby-loving former whip who represents Uxbridge. Last year’s joint winner and our bet as this year’s dark horse.
10. John Thurso, Liberal Democrat.
The Eton-educated 3rd Viscount Thurso gave up his hereditary title to become a mere member of parliament for Caithness and Sutherland. But his aristocratic facial hair more than makes up for this loss of status. Although we did prefer him when he went for a twiddly tache.
Flett tells us: “Thurso continues to have fantastic weather-releated beards.”
The winner will be announced on December 14th. Keith Flett expects they will take the role seriously.
I’d hope that they use it to promote the cause of hirsuteness. Given the rise of beards in the general population, with hipsters and all that, there should be more hirsute men in parliament.
But Labour doesn’t have the obsession that it once did have around it. At the moment you couldn’t say there’s a young successor to Jeremy Corbyn making his way up.