1. Angels With Filthy Souls
The movie that Kevin is watching throughout the Home Alone series seems like a real gut-busting classic… but don’t expect to find it at your local Blockbuster. No, not just because Blockbusters have mostly been turned into vacant, sketchy locations for drug deals. Because it hasn’t been made (yet).
2. Death Blow
There are a ton of fake movies mentioned in Seinfeld, but we think this is the most appealing one by far. It’s a bummer that Jerry and Kramer left the movie before they found out what the death blow is. We want answers. “When someone tries to blow you up, not because of who you are, but for different reasons altogether.” WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
3. Satan’s Alley
Tropic Thunder was a movie in a movie, but that didn’t stop it from establishing the “careers” of its main characters through a few other movies presented as trailers before the film. Haven’t you always wondered what kind of a movie wins the Beijing Film Festival’s “Coveted Crying Monkey Award”? Starring five time Academy Award Winner “Kirk Lazarus,” and MTV Movie Award Best Kiss winner “Not Frodo”.
The movie that kicks off Goldmember was a parody of the parody series (featuring an all-star cast of course). It would totally be OK if the entire film was just Danny DeVito smoking a cigar and being disgusting and running around with Kevin Spacey laughing at children and breaking stuff.
10. Any Documentary By Steve Zissou
Although we’re particularly interested in Born On The Ganges, any elongated shots of Steve being a complete weirdo and interacting with pseudo-made-up sea creatures would make for an incredible drinking game. “Drink every time you feel incredibly awkward.”
11. Angels Live In My Town
No, it’s NOT the second album from the CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED CANADIAN PUNK ROCK BAND Belvedere. It’s two porn stars who decide to make an action movie together. WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO RIGHT? Boogie Nights was fun and all we guess but really, who wouldn’t want to watch sixteen hours of Mark Wahlberg and John C. Reilly with open shirts, pointing guns at random stuff with lots of nauseating camera zooms?