Los Angeles just rolled out some very straight-forward advice for transit riders with helpful titles like, "Heads-up or Headless?" and "Dismount or Dismembered."
Despite its car-centric reputation, L.A. actually has a growing public transit system, and with new trains running to the beach and the eastern suburbs, Metro Los Angeles put out a series of videos to educate residents about transit safety.
They do not...hold back.
The PSAs are set in the fictional town of "Safetyville," a place that contrary to its name is actually the scene of one horrific death after another.
In "Present or Pulverized," for example, Joan is distracted by her phone, steps over the line at the train station, and gets, well, pulverized.
Either this happens a lot in Safetyville, or Joan's fellow commuter can't be bothered, but they then proceed to step over her body parts to board the train.
Note the realistic pulverization sound at the moment Joan is hit.
Elsewhere in Safetyville, the carnage continues when Mike tries to beat a train with his new car.
"Uh oh," the narrator says seconds later as a lifeless body dangles from a wreckage. "Mike's joyriding days are over."
No one is spared from the horrors of public transit in Safetyville. For example, Jimmy — who appears to be a child — tries to flee a cop on his skateboard, runs over a pebble, and gets his leg ripped off by a passing train.
"Uh oh, it looks like Jimmy won't be showing off his new 360 kick flip," the narrator concludes. "Make sure you obey warning signs. Safety begins with you."
And poor Jose, who was on his way to a job interview, ends up impaled.
"Uh oh, it looks like Jose's career took a different path," the narrator says. "Always stop before the limit line at train crossings."
Martin gets crushed en route to the beach.
"Uh oh, it looks like Martin won't be catching that wave," the narrator explains.
And Jack is literally decapitated.
"Uh oh, it looks like Jack took quite a spill," the narrator says as Jack's head bounces on the platform. "Never run to catch the train."
Though the videos depict brutal scenes, they come as L.A. increasingly becomes a place where cars, trains, and people intersect. For example, Metro's newly-expanded Gold and Expo lines — which run to the San Gabriel Valley and Santa Monica, respectively — have long sections that run at street level. And both of those lines have experienced run-ins with vehicles.
"We have a lot of new people, a lot of new riders, and a lot of new drivers that are engaging the trains for the first time," John Gordon, Metro's director of social media, told BuzzFeed News.
Gordon — who has also waged a "haiku battle" with San Francisco's BART system — said goal of the videos was to "create something that people would react to" and that the response has been "overwhelmingly positive."
"I think we hit the right tone between gruesomeness and levity," he added.
Jim Dalrymple is a reporter for BuzzFeed News and is based in Los Angeles.
Contact Jim Dalrymple II at email@example.com.
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