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1. A planner that promises to raise your productivity by helping you lay out your daily and weekly goals and complete tasks more easily by breaking your time down into manageable 25-minute intervals.
2. A set of produce-saving bins, because it's so much easier to eat more fruits and vegetables when they don't turn to mush IMMEDIATELY.
3. A set of super-soft wrinkle-, fade-, and stain-resistant sheets, since you know you're going to keep eating pad Thai in bed and you might as well get yourself an insurance policy.
4. While we're on the subject of beds: a bed frame, because they're not that expensive and it's amazing how much more put-together your room will look once you get your bed up off the floor (plus, think of all that untapped storage potential).
5. A three-bit R2D2 screwdriver (including one flat head and two Phillips-heads), because you should definitely have a screwdriver by now, because these are the tools you're looking for.
6. A set of six encouraging folders to give you the boost you need to finally organize that scary stack of Important Papers.
7. A handheld clothes steamer, because it's 2018 and you don't have to know how to iron to look sharp.
8. An app that gives you cash rewards for buying things that, let's be honest, you're definitely already buying.
9. Microfiber mop slippers so your walks from the couch to the fridge will be at least marginally productive.
10. An Instant Pot, a programmable pressure cooker, slow cooker, rice cooker, sauté-er, yogurt maker(!), steamer, and warmer all in one — aka the kitchen appliance to end all kitchen appliances, to help you master meal prep once and for all.
11. A quick-reference apron to serve as your cheat sheet for cooking times and measurement conversions so you won't have to frantically google mid-dinner prep.
12. How Not to Kill Your Houseplant — a book whose name is pretty self-explanatory! — because having plants is an easy way to spruce up your space, but not if they're dead.
13. A personalized vitamin regimen sent to your home, so you never have to wonder whether ketchup is actually fulfilling your daily dose of vitamin C.
14. A car-bage can you can hang over your seat, because it doesn't take that much effort to make your car look a whole lot nicer.
15. An electric toothbrush cute enough that it might convince you to finally make your dentist proud.
16. A moisturizer with SPF so you can protect yourself from UV rays and dispatch dry skin in one fell swoop, because mornings are hard, no matter how old you are.
17. Cleaning putty, which is by far the most fun way to get all those crumbs out of your keyboard (or, in the case of one reviewer, melted chocolate out of your phone).
18. Micellar water, a miracle liquid that both removes makeup and cleanses your skin all at once, because you know you should be taking off your makeup and washing your face before bed, but like...you're supposed to do BOTH of those things? That sounds so tiring!
19. A two-sided hamper so you can separate your lights and darks like you KNOW you're meant to but still never do because laundry is already enough work, geez!
20. A serious umbrella, because in your twenties you buy the shittiest umbrella you can find at the exact moment when you need it, and in your thirties you buy a really good one that will actually keep you dry.
22. A very cute little sewing kit — including scissors, a seam ripper, a thimble, needle threaders, needles, thread, and safety pins — so you can mend your pants and your ways.
24. A shower speaker shaped like a little sea creature, because sometimes showering is the worst, and you need a little musical friend to give you that final push.
25. A bright tumbler to help you keep on top of your hydration habits — just move those little bands up to count the number of cups you drink throughout the day.
26. An adjustable laptop desk because you're an adult with responsibilities who also likes maximizing bed time — that's right, you contain multitudes!
27. A microfiber llama duster, because being an adult isn't about liking to clean, it's about effectively tricking yourself into cleaning with cleaning supplies that look like other, better things.
Hey, we're all figuring this out together!
Some reviews in this post have been edited for length and/or clarity.