1. Cut it into cute, colorful doggy poop bags.
2. Use it to line your cat's litter box.
3. Tear it into handkerchiefs to use when you have swine flu. Then burn the handkerchiefs immediately.
4. Cut it into strips to use as extra toilet paper in the powder room at your plantation.
5. Keep one in the back of your toilet tank to reduce water usage.
6. Use it to clean your toilet so your hands don't get dirty.
7. Use it as a rag to clean up counters and surfaces after your "Ding Dong The Flag Is Gone" party.
8. Sew it into a Katniss Everdeen-style gown that catches on fire when you walk into a room.
9. Use it as an oil rag to service your truck.
10. Wad it up and shove it down your garbage disposal to check the blade strength.
11. Wad it up and shove it into a tree mulcher to check the blade strength.
12. Make it into a chainsaw-target and use it to test the blade strength.
13. Fold and stuff it into a scarecrow for scaring away literally everyone, including all birds and other sentient beings.
14. Spray it with pesticides and cover it with dirt to keep away slugs.
15. Tie the corners and use it as a garbage bag.
16. Tie the corners and use it as a bag to put all the other Confederate Flags in before you put them in the garbage dump.
17. Burn it as fuel for a garbage fire if you work at a garbage dump.
18. Burn it as fuel for a bon fire when you go camping.
19. Use it in your classroom for a history lesson…if the power goes out and you need to burn something as fuel.
