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11 Of The Most Savage Burns In Literature

Drag them, legends.

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1. “Your little dog licks your mouth and lips, Manneia. I am not surprised — it always enjoyed eating shit.”—Martial, Epigrams I.63

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2. “I never saw anybody take so long to dress, and with such little result.”— Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest

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3. "Villain, I have done thy mother!" — Shakespeare, Titus Andronicus

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4. “In my mind, Martha, you are buried in cement right up to your neck. No… right up to your nose… that’s much quieter.” – Edward Albee, Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf

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5. “The man is as useless as nipples on a breastplate.” – George R.R. Martin, A Feast for Crows

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6. "I desire that we be better strangers." — Shakespeare, As You Like It

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7. “Confusion is a luxury which only the very, very young can possibly afford and you are not that young anymore.” — James Baldwin, Giovanni's Room

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8. “Zoilus, why do you pollute the bath by plunging your ass into it? A tip — Want to make it filthier? Do this: Submerge your head in the bath as well.” — Martial, II.42

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9. "She is a peacock in everything but beauty!” - Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

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10. "I'll beat thee, but I would infect my hands." — Shakespeare, Timon of Athens

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11. "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve." — J.R.R. Tolkien, Fellowship of the Ring

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