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23 Real And Hilarious Jokes About Breaking Up

Your ex is posting passive-aggressive spiritual memes again.

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Guy: I think we should see other people. Me: *claps along to mariachi band standing next to table* haha what

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Dating is collecting information about someone until you realize you don't like them

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when ur drunk and ur ex texts you "hey"

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Do u hear that music? "ugh its my crazy ex again" How can you tell? [i come whipping around the corner in an ice cream truck] FUCK YOU GREG

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the stages of a breakup: 1. denial 2. anger 3. bargaining 4. taking pictures of everything you do to make sure people know you're having fun

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COP: u were swerving a lot so i have to conduct a sobriety test ME: ok COP: lets get taco bell ME: no COP: text ur ex ME: no COP: ok ur good

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Lawyer: did your boyfriend commit the crime? Girlfriend: honey he can't even commit to this relationship Entire jury: OH SNAP

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I tried to swipe a crumb off my phone and accidentally liked all 240 pictures of my ex girlfriend’s trip to Maui with Roger

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EX: WHAT HAPPENED TO US? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE MAGIC IN OUR RELATIONSHIP? ME:

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Repeatedly unfollowing and refollowing my ex in Morse code that spells out "I still have your Gilmore Girls DVDs"

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Your ex is posting passive-aggressive spiritual memes again

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IF U BUMP INTO UR EX WITH HIS NEW GIRL ACT FAKE EXCITED TO MEET HER AND SINCERELY SAY "OMG I RLY LIKE UR PAJAMAS" NO MATTER WHAT SHE WEARING

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When your ex says they'll find someone better than you

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HOW TO RESPECTFULLY BREAK UP WITH SOMEONE: -do it in person -be honest -do less karate -why are u doing so much karate during this -stop it

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Sorry I broke up with you by saying "have a great summer"

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Very normal stages of anger: 1) kinda upset 2) crying 3) imagining yourself singing a revengeful song to them at a talent show

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