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15 Waters That Must Be Stopped

H2-nooooo.

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1. Maple water.

Wait, does it taste like pancakes?? I'm in if it tastes like pancakes.
adweek.com

Wait, does it taste like pancakes?? I'm in if it tastes like pancakes.

2. Whole Foods' $6 asparagus water.

*whispers* does it still make your pee smell
greatideas.people.com

*whispers* does it still make your pee smell

3. This artichoke water named "Arty."

Go home, Arty, you're drunk.
telegraph.co.uk

Go home, Arty, you're drunk.

4. Cactus water.

I prefer that other cactus water: tequila.
nydailynews.com

I prefer that other cactus water: tequila.

5. $65 "Dirty Lemon" water infused with charcoal.

I just...no.
stylecaster.com

I just...no.

6. OGO oxygen water.

After a long workout, I really want only a Christmas tree ornament's worth of hydration.
lovelypackage.com

After a long workout, I really want only a Christmas tree ornament's worth of hydration.

7. "Hawaiian volcanic" water.

For the person who sneers at Fiji.
cargocollective.com

For the person who sneers at Fiji.

8. Birch water.

I guess all the trees moved to San Francisco and decided to start their own waters.
foxnews.com

I guess all the trees moved to San Francisco and decided to start their own waters.

9. Black water.

Goth AF.
convozine.com

Goth AF.

10. Aloe water.

If it's going to be aloe, it needs pulp.
Flickr: jeepersmedia

If it's going to be aloe, it needs pulp.

11. Balance water for women.

It could only be better if it came with a husband who ~actually~ helps out around the house! haha amirite ladies
femail.com.au

It could only be better if it came with a husband who ~actually~ helps out around the house! haha amirite ladies

12. Boxed water.

Good for the environment, but bad for my desire to not punch someone in the eye.
mlive.com

Good for the environment, but bad for my desire to not punch someone in the eye.

13. Almond water.

Turning almonds into water has to be the root of the California drought, right?
gourmetnewsenews.wordpress.com

Turning almonds into water has to be the root of the California drought, right?

14. Glace rare iceberg water.

Just try to drink it without thinking about Leo and Kate.
pinterest.com

Just try to drink it without thinking about Leo and Kate.

15. And... Boston water?

In Philly they call it "wooder."
drinkwataah.com

In Philly they call it "wooder."

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