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Millennials, Everything You Wore In Middle School Is Back To Haunt You

Should we warn the teens, or let them suffer through velour pants like we did?

Grab yourselves a seat, Ye Millennial Ladies of Old.

Milanphd / Getty Images

First, Steve Madden announced it was bringing back the Slinky, aka your absolute go-to junior high shoe.

But did you know...all the Cool Looks you used to wear in the late '90s/early '00s are BACK IN STYLE?? And teens are wearing them?

Exhibit A: Currently on sale at Forever 21, this crushed velour top.

Yup, the same one you bought from Delia's in 1997 with your mom's credit card.

Teens are giving Forever 21 $27 for the privilege of wearing Von Dutch trucker hats. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

HOLY SHIT, YIN YANG CHOKERS ARE BACK.

Remember the rainbow boob stripe?

THE RAINBOW BOOB STRIPE IS BACK AT BRANDY MELVILLE.*

*A prominent teen fashion emporium.
brandymelvilleusa.com

*A prominent teen fashion emporium.

Colored-lens sunglasses? BACK.

us.asos.com, Bwp Media / Getty Images

You wore this daisy-print dress going to see The Wedding Planner in theaters. Yes, yes you did.

SLIP DRESSES ARE BACK.

Remember that time you wore basically lingerie to school to impress Justin from bio?
forever21.com

Remember that time you wore basically lingerie to school to impress Justin from bio?

POLO SHIRTS ARE BACK.

🚨 TATTOO CHOKERS ARE FREAKIN' BACK, PEOPLE. 🚨

BUCKET HATS ARE BACK.

Yes, THOSE bucket hats.

This is an ironic Saved by the Bell T-shirt for $39.

Mini-backpacks that barely fit a quarter to call your mom from the pay phone to come pick you up? Back.

Long denim skirts with that V split in the middle? Sooo back.

Oh dear god, this is back.

*whispers through tears* Adidas track pants.

And speaking of Sporty Spice, Urban Outfitters is selling a "girl power" shirt for $52.

The spaghetti strap over a white tee is so hot right now. So, so hot.

Look at this entire outfit!!

This pants-and-shoe combo is what you were wearing when you asked Ryan P. to homecoming!

And finally, the apex of the late-'90s renaissance: Spaghetti straps, crushed velour, AND those long skinny and pointless scarves are back.

See you at the senior center!!!!

FOX
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