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    16 Ways To Answer One Question: Are You Jewish?

    If my mother asks, the answer is #1.

    1. Yes.

    2. No.

    3. I'm half.

    4. Jew-ish, I’d say.

    5. I was BORN Jewish.

    6. My parents are.

    7. My parents think I am.

    8. I don’t know if I have a choice.

    9. Culturally, but not religiously. (Jon Stewart is my God).

    10. As far as the organizers of Birthright are concerned, yes.

    11. I had a Bar Mitzvah, but I only did it for the "benjamins" (read: Israel bonds).

    12. Only on High Holidays (and not the 4/20 kind).

    13. What, do I “look” Jewish? What are you trying to say?

    14. Look at me. Nose goes.

    15. I CAN be, if that’ll make your mother happy.

    16. You met me on JDate, so clearly.