1. Expectation: You’re going to stay up ALL NIGHT and party hard!
Reality: You fall asleep in your hotel room at 7 p.m. and sleep through till the next morning.
2. Expectation: You’re gonna get rich! Rich, I say!
Reality: After a $40 win on the penny slots, you decide to quit while you’re ahead.
3. Expectation: You’ll get a sweet tan at the hotel pool every afternoon.
Reality: The water is ice cold, the kids won’t stop screaming and you end up with third-degree burns.
4. Expectation: Elvis is alive and well in very convincing incarnations.
Reality: Midget “Elvis.”
5. Expectation: You’ll stroll down The Strip in a day.
Reality: The Strip is so long, everything is so far away and your feet really, really hurt.
Reality: You eat a light meal at the hotel bistro and snacks in your room pretty much every night.
7. Expectation: Maybe you’ll do something crazy and get married!
Reality: Cuddling in that insanely comfortable king-size bed in your hotel room is all you really need.
8. Expectation: You’ll take a nice little day trip to the Grand Canyon and be back on the Strip in time for dinner.
Reality: It’s five hours to the South Rim. FIVE HOURS. EACH WAY. You leave at 6 a.m. and don’t get back until nearly midnight.
9. Expectation: You’ll get drunk as hell on the free-flowing booze, which you can even drink on the street!
10. Expectation: You’ll come back with some crazy stories to tell.
Reality: Of course you’ve got them, but what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, right?
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