27 Secrets Convent School Girls Will Never Tell You
ABSTINENCE, ABSTINENCE, ABSTINENCE!
Mass was the best possible substitute for a lesson.
And "Peace Be With You" was always your favourite bit.
Although the potential for rejection was very real.
Although you didn't have to be a Catholic to get in, everyone knew about it if you weren't.
Besides, it meant you missed out on Communion during a lengthy Mass.
All of your school buildings were named after obscure saints.
And the majority were haunted.
But none of them were as scary as the nun graveyard.
You had more religious statues than students.
Uniform standards were ruthlessly enforced.
But the "only crucifix jewelry" rule was heavily abused.
The only thing you learnt in Sex Education was, predictably, abstinence.
But your puberty chats were more graphic than Saw.
If you got caught swearing, or blaspheming, you were done for.
There were at least four Theresas in your year.
Any male teacher who was younger than 40 automatically became the real focus of worship.
Every local boy thought convent girls were hot.
But there was a strict "no hands" rule at any mixed function.
Morning prayers always included a dirty word.
The novelty of being presented with a Bible soon wore off.
The Devil was always referred to as Satan or Lucifer.
Convents came with a lot of merch.
Studying R.E. was compulsory.
And The Prince of Egypt was played at least once a year for "revision".
Ash Wednesdays launched the annual competitions of who could keep the mark on their forehead the longest.
And your sole aim during Confession was to freak out the priest.
But hey - you've got a first class ticket to heaven!
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