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5 Mar 2018

Literally Just 39 Of The Best Tweets About The 2018 Oscars

And the Oscar goes to Grinding Nemo.

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The lights go out at the Oscars. A scream. The lights rush back on. Uma Thurman stands on stage holding a bloody Oscar statuette. “I heard time was up...” Uma whispers into the microphone. “But I just restarted the clock.”

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meryl streep out here looking like the fairy godmother from shrek 2 #oscars

4.

Looked up and saw Kobe Bryant holding an Oscar next to BB8 I think my edibles just kicked in.

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isn’t the answer just ‘the shape of its container’

6.

What realization did Jennifer Garner just come to?

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She's gone too far, you can buy carpet everywhere

8.

Maya Rudolph and Tiffany Haddish appeared and I immediately screamed "Thelma and Louise reboot" at a stranger.

9.

[IN MEMORIAM: Ben Affleck’s career as a prestige filmmaker.] “Oh my ... who could have snuck THAT in there?” #Oscars https://t.co/su39S14jnD

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La La Land’s brief Best Picture win should have been in the In Memoriam

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I firmly believe that @carlyraejepsen 's "Call Me By Your Name" should win Best Picture #Oscars

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Remember Billy The Butcher? This is him now. Feel old yet?

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Fun fact: we once made my dad a fake Oscar for acting comfortable at these things for 40 years straight

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My life goal is to be a “who she?” in the In Memoriam at the Oscars.

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Me: I'm not going to be overly dramatic tonight. Also me:

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I heard somebody refer to “The Shape of Water” as “Grinding Nemo” and I’m never going to get over it.

19.

Jane Fonda is looking at that crowd like "I've worked with all of you and you were average."

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Asian Get Out is about an Asian guy and he’s in a room where people ask him to set up their printer for nine hours

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I can't believe they snubbed The Shape of Water's original song, I Can't Wait To Fuck This Fish

23.

I never wanted a world where we had to choose between Allison Janney and Laurie Metcalf

24.

The #Oscars are making sure you know you have the right envelope this year.

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thinking about lady bird’s zero (0) #oscars wins

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tonight is the first time sufjan stevens has taken a physical form instead of wafting through the air as the wisp of an extinguished unscented candle

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Pitch: Movie about a married couple, at two points in their life

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meryl streep is about that life #oscars

31.

omg can you imagine being stoned in a movie theater and suddenly the lights come on, Armie Hammer walks in and throws a giant hot dog at your face

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And no one ever talks about the #ShapeOfWater prequel. #Oscars

34.

I choose to believe that Sam Rockwell won for his role in Charlie’s Angels. #Oscars

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When there's blood on the moon, but this time you remembered your tiger's eye

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Nothing but respect for MY Oscar

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It’s over? That was quick. #Oscars

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