The 9 Types Of Terrible Puns You Always See On The News

    Chas Licciardello of The Chaser's Media Circus shares his puntastic knowledge.

    The Chaser are back, this time turning their satirical eyes to the media in The Chaser's Media Circus.

    The show will see team combine with different journalists and comedians to discuss (read: make fun of) the week's news and play media-related games.

    Chas Licciardello will act as a "one-man media brains trust" on the show ("a sort of cross between Dickie Knee and Rain Man", according to the press release), so naturally we wanted to pick his brain on the best part of the news: puns.

    1. The Key Graphic Pun

    Chas: Back in the '90s these were a dime a dozen. But alas, with the proliferation of news shows these days, the puns in the key graphics over newsreaders’ shoulders have all but disappeared. Bravo, Ten. Bravo!

    2. The "Please Explain" Pun

    Chas: The thing we like about this category is that the scriptwriters have so little faith in their puns that they feel they have to explain them immediately.

    3. The Mock-Criticised Pun

    Chas: This is an increasingly common move – newsreaders read a cringeworthy pun and then offer a critique of the said pun, thinking it absolves them of all responsibility. It doesn’t. Newsreaders, that emotion you’re feeling that makes you want to do that is "shame". Listen to that emotion. It stops people committing crimes.

    4. The Cat Pun

    Chas: These are a news staple. Pun-filled cat stories are kind of like the internet – but three months later, with more shit jokes!

    5. The Pun Orgy

    Chas: Sometimes it’s just too easy. Like this teaser about a bear playing with a golfing pole. Which pun to use – a reference to Jack Nicklaus, the "Golden Bear"? A "flag bearer" pun? A "pole dancing" pun? We only have a few seconds to fill... bugger it! Let’s do all of them!

    6. The "Doesn't Quite Bear Scrutiny" Pun

    Chas: Banana prices don’t get drunk. So we don’t really understand how they can go on a bender. Although logging these puns certainly makes us want to go on one.

    7. The Political Pun

    Chas: Political reporters love spicing up dreary reports with puns. We think it might be related to one of The Chaser’s most cherished rules: “Comedy – Funny + Politics = Satire!” And you have to admit they’re a higher class of pun than animal-based ones. Like this pun here refers to Barry O’Farrell’s previous experiences at the ICAC. You see what they did there? Ahh…. satire.

    8. The Overemphasised Pun

    Chas: General rule of punnery: if you need to change the way you deliver a line to signify that you are making a pun then stop and back away from the microphone. And no sudden moves. That goes for you too, Capper.

    9. The 'K' For 'Qu' Swap

    Chas: We’ve got some seriously advanced wordplay here – the rarely seen “‘qualify’ becomes ‘koala-fy’” move. Channel 10 have hired themselves a pro. Note the lap of honour with the “Koalaty Story” banner. I’m imagining a scriptwriter in a newsroom gesturing, “Come at me, bro!”

    The Chaser’s Media Circus airs Wednesdays at 8.30pm on ABC.