I Ranked The 27 Dresses From "27 Dresses" And Am 100% Right
This is the definitive, 100% accurate ranking.
27 Dresses is, without a doubt, one of the best rom-coms to emerge from the late 2000s.
Yeah, I said it.
For those who have never watched this cinematic masterpiece, the premise is that Jane (Katherine Heigl) is always a bridesmaid, never a bride. She gets to know Kevin (James Marsden), a journalist with his own agenda. Cue her own journey to being a bride, complete with one beautiful montage in which she models her many bridesmaid dresses for Kevin.
It's a good opportunity to participate in the best part of wedding culture: judging the fashion. Here is a ranking of all the dresses we see...
27. The Bo Peep dress:
As Kevin says in the movie, the theme of this dress seems to be "humiliation." Fun for a costume party, maybe, but not much else.
26. The green '80s number:
I want to know what year Jane was meant to be a bridesmaid in when she wore this. Not a good look past 1990.
25. The olive dress:
The cut of this dress isn't great, but it's passable — the color, however, is just the worst. The kind of bridesmaid dress that makes you think the bride is punishing you.
24. The pink peplum:
Remember when peplums were a whole thing? This dress has a lot going on, and again, is very '80s.
23. The pale-pink ball gown:
There's nothing particularly offensive about this dress, but there's nothing particularly nice about it, either. The color is nice, I guess?
22. The ultimate bridesmaid dress:
When you picture a stereotypical bridesmaid dress, it probably looks a lot like this. For such a bland dress, there's A LOT happening. The collar! The sparkles! The tie at the waist! It's basically a Franken-dress.
21. The blue lacy dress:
I feel like there's a world where this dress is not terrible — if it were a bit shorter, with a different waistline, maybe — but we do not live in that world.
20. The mint bolero look:
This is a lovely color, but the style is such a painfully '00s look that it's hard to think fondly of it. The bolero! We were subjected to so many boleros!
19. The pink '80s number:
Another bizarrely '80s outfit, but weirdly flattering? I don't hate it, and I can't quite say why.
18. The yellow outfit:
The color is great on Jane. The top half of the dress isn't bad. The bottom half is a little bad. The accessories are a lot bad.
17. The blue bustle:
The color is nice, and so is the beading, but the style is awful. The bustle, in particular, is heinous.
16. The lacy look:
With some edits, this dress could actually look really great. But she high-key looks like the mother of the bride at an '80s wedding.
15. The Barbie dress:
This dress gives an extreme Barbie vibe. Not a bad thing — except Jane looks extreeeeemely uncomfortable in it, so it loses a lot of points for that.
14. The cowgirl fit:
Is this absurd for a wedding? Yes. But doesn't she look kinda cute? And she'd totally be able to repurpose that outfit, with some alterations.
13. The short strapless blue dress:
Contrary to some of the other dresses, this dress is peak 2008. It's not the worst. But it's far from the best.
12. The dress-and-hat combo:
The dress itself is not bad at all — I think the layered skirt is kind of nice — but the hat! Oh, the hat is bad.
11. The pink-and-yellow fluff ball:
This dress is kind of terrible but also kind of incredible? Maybe I've been staring at too many bad dresses, or maybe it's just the delight in Jane's pose here, but there's something so fun about it.
10. The Goth look:
Unfortunately, we can't see what this dress really looks like — but from what we can see, it's kind of fine? I mean, a spiked choker is not what many of us would pick for our wedding, but Jane looks pretty hot.
9. The pink sweetheart dress:
This is another very '00s dress, but all things considered, it holds up pretty well. Jane is forced into a lot of pink dresses, but this shade is particularly great on her.
8. The scuba glam:
I can feel some anger already about how high this is on the list. But look, it's RIDICULOUS — yet also fun and adorable. It makes me smile, and it gets a top 10 spot for that alone.
7. The kimono:
This is really pretty! Just not a fave.
6. The whimsical peach:
Objectively, I think this dress is kind of ugly. But Jane floats around like a fairy with such joy and whimsy, I can't help but love it.
5. The top hat dress:
The top hat is, well, over the top, but I actually think this dress is really, really cute.
4. The suit:
I'd enjoy this more if the tailoring were better, but considering the '00s setting, this is pretty damn good.
3. The empire waist dress:
Maybe I watch too many Jane Austen period dramas, but I'm a huge fan of this silhouette. She looks lovely!
2. The sari:
This is the best bridesmaid look, no doubt about it.
1. The wedding dress:
OF COURSE this is the winner. It's her wedding dress! The whole movie has been building up to this! It's simple, but Jane looks beautiful in it. What's not to love?