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21 Questions Sydney Has For Melbourne

Do you ever get tired of being wrong about potato scallops?

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1. What's with all the laneways?

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2. Do you ever actually get lost in Melbourne?

3. Do you have to carry an umbrella at all times, just in case?

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4. Why is your Luna Park face so terrifying?!

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5. Is your coffee ACTUALLY that good? Really?

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6. How does it feel to be the hipster capital of Australia?

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7. Why do you call them bathers, when you don't actually ~bathe~ in them?

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8. How do you all get a day off just for a goddamn horse race?!

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9. What the hell is with your crazy hook turns?

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10. Do you ever get annoyed at all the trams everywhere?

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11. Why do you call Woolworths, Safeway?

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12. Do you ever get tired of being wrong about scallops?

13. Why is it called Federation Square when it's more of a trapezoid/rectangle?

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14. Why is your river so brown?

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15. And why are all your cabs yellow (what is this, New York)?

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16. Do any of you actually care about NRL?

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17. Real talk, do you sometimes secretly hate all the graffiti everywhere?

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18. Are you all really poor because of the amazing shops you have access to?

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19. Why on EARTH didn't you keep the name Batmania?!

20. Do you get sick of people mispronouncing Melbourne?

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21. And have you got any more Hemsworths hiding out down there?

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