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one day I'll get the hang of this 😔😔
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also i discovered the character expression sheets for beverly hills chihuahua and theyve shaken me to my very core
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My mom is a scammer 😂😂😂
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when you realize the statue of mona lisa looks like keith urban 😳
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Am fucking embarrassed to call this thing my pal
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Just realised that my club stamp says yer da sells avon, ffs scotland
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im at the age where people r askin "so what u doin with ur life" n im like mate am genuinely jus here for a laff x
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I told my mom I went out and she deadass made a meme of herself.
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this choker trend is wild y'all i wore a shoelace to the bars last night & i've never gotten so many compliments th… https://t.co/Tyi5Ns9ecr
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today i found all the subtweets my roommate has made about me, so i printed them out and hung them up in our dorm ❤
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I keep this pic of Terry Crews in my wallet so I can see it when I'm about to waste money on things I don't need Iol
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Deadass spent 2 hours doing project on Youth in Asia then find out it's supposed to be on Euthanasia. Summer wya 😭
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any clown comes anywhere near ma personal bubble get yer fuckin stopwatches out cos usains record is getting shagged
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When u realise that u text both ur tings last night and it created a group chat 😭 ffs
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OMFG THIS OLD MAN SENT ME THIS DM ON INSTAGRAM AND I CANT STOP SCREAMING
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me in my boos dm: fuck I can't wait til u lick my asshole & creampie me daddy 😛😛😛😛😛 me when I see him:
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These days I can't sweat anymore without people thinking I'm wearing highlighter. I still don't even understand what that is
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omg my grandpa is my grandma's lock screen this is the cutest thing i've ever seen
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who the FUCK brings a bag of CHOPPED RED ONIONS to school just to throw them in the TOILET i fuckin HATE my school
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MY MUM BOUGHT ME A VIVIANE WESTEOOD SHIRT SHE THOUGHT IT WAS JUST COOL PATTERNS AND I LOOKED CLOSELY AND WELL
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Welp. #Election2016
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my mom and my little brother switched phones and my mom received this text and I am crying lmaooo
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the team helped me out with good lighting to take a nice pic of me eating pizza
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i hope the KILLER CLOWNS don't come and MURDER ME at my HOME in FORT LAUDERDALE, FLORIDA (near the beach, take a left at
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I HAD THESE WHITE KIDS SHOOK
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I'm embarrassed
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Had 20 mins spare so i decided to go see the fam
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the last time I was somebody's type I was donating blood
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My dad is so mean lmao
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I just accidentally charged my mother's card $733 @Sephora
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When you're told to change ur shirt before Thanksgiving Dinner so you happily oblige :-)
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Been at uni two minutes and mums already cock blocked me
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did shrek not wear this
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My stepdad didn't know we were in the group chat 💀💀
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I've been in college for a whole semester and my dog still waits for me to get off the bus
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when u study for a test all night but right when you walk into class you forget everything
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honestly
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We surprised our teacher with kittens because her cat passed away yesterday💗
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My mom dressed up as my dog noooooo
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My dogs favorite toy is Santa, so we brought her to see him
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I WAS TRYNNA VIDEO A RACCOON AND IT JUST PICKED UP MY PHONE AND TOOK OFF
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This also happened tonight
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Beyond excited to announce that I'm giving up! I'm so grateful for this opportunity and can't wait to see where this decision takes me
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YALL I LOOKED THROUGH THE REFLECTION OF MY GLASS SLIDING DOOR AND I THOUGHT MY DOG WAS CHILLIN ON FIRE BUT IT WAS J… https://t.co/VDNW1vOKTV
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I come home from school to my mom shaving my dog... now she's the scariest lama I've ever seen
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joeys school had lunch w dads today and since my dads in bahrain they facetimed while he ate and i'm so in love.
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This woman almost just ran me over in the parking garage. What a bitch. How could she get my hopes up like that I was so ready
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I SENT MY DAD A PIC OF ME EATING HIS CAKE AND HE LOCKED THE FREAKING FRIDGE ?!?!!!
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my mom is so extra look at what she did to my dogs
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my mom was mad bc my dad wasn't "giving her attention" so she lit a paper on fire & held it to the smoke alarm 😂😭
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An actual conversation between me and a girl I was "dating" in 6th grade
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*Me studying* *Gets ONE phone notification* *Go to reply* *Mom walks by*... Mom: "SO YOU'VE BEEN TEXTING THIS ENTIRE TIME?!?!"
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@ayydubs this is how I came out yesterday lolol
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so my mom packed me a four loko for lunch ...
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My sister is quite the speller
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can't trust any girls so i decided to ask myself to homecoming:))) (i said yes)
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omg so this kid I'm doin a group project with is mad tall n I asked him how tall he was and he pulled out his walle… https://t.co/khMUxwnuQV
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WE SENT COMPLAINTS TO GOOGLE MAPS SAYING SHANKLAND ROAD WAS ACTUALLY HARAMBE DRIVE AND THEY CHANGED IT IM SCREAMING
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My step sister put glow sticks on her body 💀💀💀
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Don't sleep on your bus
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So this morning I made my chickens tiny pancakes bc I love them and they is good chickens 🐣
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My sister really made me a bow tie.. OUT OF MY OWN HAIR. it's time to move out
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And here is a video of my little sister trying to pronounce the word "who"😭😭😭😭
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when ur sister uses deodorant for the first time n gets the ruler out cos "it's to be 15cm away"
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THE EASTER BUNNY CAME TO MY DOGS' DAYCARE WHY AM I CRYING REALLY HARD
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when ur boyfriend comes home drunk when ur meant to be 'staying in' together
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me trying to face my problems
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Whoever thought of appetizers was literally like "we should pregame this food w more food" and I think that's really beautiful
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anyone want a new mom?
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when you push a pull door and the person behind says "you need to pull" aye cheers lad sure next plan was to start lifting from the bottom
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throwback to when the car insurance lady asked my mom for front, rear, & side views but she didn't get the memo..
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Me: - doesn't eat healthy - never has 8 hrs sleep - never works out - drinks 0.5ml of water a day - unorganized mess Also me: why am I sad
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My mom made everyone get out of her picture with the food cause "ain't nobody help"
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Whenever this weird swimming deformed cube of cheese notices I'm watching him he stares at me like he gonna kill me… https://t.co/cYaadOwOJb
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if you think 2016 is trash then ur gonna be really disappointed when it's the year 3000 & nothing's changed except they live underwater
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HAHAHAHAH ARE YOU KIDDING