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We Watched "Pretty Little Liars" Season 6 Episode 13 And Had A Lot Of Thoughts

ICYMI, Ezra likes small women.

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1. I don't think this is what actually constitutes a spa day.

2. Lying head to head in robes with cucumbers on your eyes.

3. And being shady.

4. What a weird fucking opening, what is that background music.

5. This is so Wysteria Lane rn.

6. Also a terrible waste of a spa voucher.

7. OMG SOMEONE'S LISTENING TO THEM.

8. OMG IS THAT…

9. IT IS!

10. SARA GODDAMN HARVEY

11. Ugh Emily.

12. Isn't it obvious Sara is only here for the free showers?

13. Aria just needs to dump Ezra 2.0 immediately because we ALLLLLLL know that she's going to bang Ezra 1.0 any day now.

14. Although Ezra 2.0 is kinda a babe.

15. Pigtunia shout out!

16. Maybe Pigtunia killed Charlotte.

17. LOL Liam asking Aria about whether she has JT posters but ignoring the fact she's wearing a shirt that's obviously from her middle school dance recital.

18. Oh Lorenzo is STILL a thing.

19. "I'm no expert" - yes we know Lorenzo. You are a part of the Rosewood Police Force after all.

20. Although strangely trying to be a good cop for once.

21. Where's Toby tho?

22. Hanna is talking on the phone to someone named Claudia. But who the hell is that?

23. We only want to hear about relevant characters thank you.

24. Ugh Hanna is being all #cleaneating. Stop bashing Rosewood, Hanna!

25. I mean, it is only the place you grew up… and were stalked and tortured for years.

26. OK maybe it's alright to hate on it.

27. LUCAS!

28. "What are you doing here?" Hanna @ Lucas and also me @ Lucas, can he gtfo I didn't like him the first time around.

29. Lol Lucas is like 22, with 5 billion houses, I'm 25 and can barely afford rent.

30. Honestly the most unrealistic part of this whole show is how bloody successful they all are.

31. But also, if I was rich AF there's no way I'd be owning some shady apartment above The Grill.

32. Why don't these people have Facebook either?

33. I mean, all those selfies from the Liars' reunion had to be uploaded somewhere.

34. I'm not buying the fact Lucas knows ~nothing~ about Hanna's life.

35. Oh Lucas.

36. We all remember you were probably A Team, mate.

37. He has been shady since day one and he's still shady AF.

38. Also when was him NOT being shady a thing? Did I miss something? Why is Hanna suddenly Team Lucas again?

39. Nope.

40. YAAAASSSS Melissa's back!!!

41. She is ageless.

42. WHERE'S WREN THOUGH?

43. Caleb is going to make Spencer food, omg he loves her.

44. "We both know you like to shop from other people's carts." Ooft Melissa, THAT SHADE.

45. Spencer, I love you - but you really do like stealing people's men.

46. And there is DEFINITELY some sexual tension between Spencer and Caleb.

47. Emily is by far the worst liar of all these liars.

48. Seriously, pause more before your shady reference of "the drug store".

49. That will make you seem wayyyyy less suss.

50. OMG Pam is going to open Emily's mail.

51. No Pam! I love you but this is not cool.

52. Goddamn Pam.

53. WHAT'S IN THE LETTER THO?

54. Poor Ashley Marin having to deal with deez kids still.

55. Literally how did Hanna not assume that the cops would be onto it if she deleted the tapes?

56. She has not got any brighter.

57. Although to be fair, it's not like the Rosewood cops have ever been good at their jobs.

58. Sucks that now is the time they decide to step up their game.

59. "I'm not in high school anymore." Lol but don't it feel like things never really changed?

60. Except the whole Jordan thing and lack of Caleb.

61. :(

62. Ezra still hasn't shaved. He's obviously still fukt.

63. Ezra needs beer. Much scruff. Such sad.

64. Just in case we hadn't already picked up Ezra has a problem with alcohol, Ashley Marin cuts him off personally.

65. I mean shit is dire if the chief wine mom is cutting you off.

66. But also Aria needs to change shirts this is getting distracting.

67. She looks like she's about to go ice dancing.

68. Wow Spencer is really good at shutting down this journalist.

69. A+ lawyer talk, Spence.

70. Emily is buuuuuusted.

71. Poor Pam :(

72. #JusticeForPam.

73. I just want to give her a wine and tell her that everything will be OK.

74. OMG SARA HARVEY YOU CREEPY FUCK.

75. FARAL.

76. Lol this journalist called A's dungeon a bunker, which makes them seem like they're fresh out of the Kimmy Schmidt cult.

77. HANNAH STOP.

78. You literally deleted those tapes.

79. This is all your fault.

80. Classic Hanna though running to Spencer to solve things when she fucks up.

81. Spencer should just cut them all loose and bail.

82. These bitches couldn't survive without her.

83. EMILY PLEASE TELL PAM THE TRUTH.

84. Omg Emily literally faked a graduation photo with shit from the costume shop.

85. This is too good.

86. Why is Hanna asking Lucas for help? UGH, HANNA!!!!!

87. Are you forgetting when he tried to kill you in a row boat?

88. And you are asking him to be your FAKE ALIBI?!

89. He is bad news for suuuuuure.

90. Also these girls should really know by now that lying to the police gets you NOWHERE.

91. I guess telling the truth gets them nowhere either though tbh.

92. They're screwed no matter what they do.

93. "I really didn't think this through." GEE YOU THINK?!

94. "Ezra likes small women."

95. OMG.

96. Y'know what else Ezra likes?

97. TEENS.

98. I mean, why else is he not interested in Aria anymore now that she's a grown arse adult HMMMM.

99. "She can't evict somebody for eating fried chicken with gloves." This episode is full of iconic lines.

100. Hanna's ringtone is "Let's Get Physical"? Lol.

101. OMG Spencer is admitting she likes Caleb.

102. I weirdly ship it.

103. Oh they didn't bang. Cool.

104. But they wanna. Cool.

105. Although I DO NOT want it to get between the friendship of Hanna and Spencer, so I'm glad they're addressing it now.

106. But also, like Hanna, no you are not OK with this, don't pretend like you are.

107. But also kinda do because I wanna watch Spaleb make out.

108. BUT ALSO DOES THIS MEAN HALEB IS OVER FOR GOOD?!

109. I'm so conflicted.

110. Ugh Aria we all know you think Ezra is king shit but cool it a little bit, girl.

111. What he says: "Maybe I'm not."

112. What he means: "I exclusively date small women."

113. This whole Ezra thing is weird he needs to just go back to being a teacher and leering at teens.

114. Yassss Spencer go in on this shady bunker journalist!!

115. Mona is working for the enemy?

116. Lol classic Mona.

117. Also… is it really a big deal though?

118. Not here for political intrigue only shady serial stalker/murder mystery intrigue.

119. Is Hanna wearing a dressing gown or is that her actual outfit?

120. Ali is on the outs again, big surprise.

121. Can she be the Big Bad tho that would be so freaking great.

122. I need to know what's wrong with Emily, does she have secret diabetes? Did they lift this plot from The Babysitter's Club?

123. Oh HEY Ezra 2.0.

124. LOL @ him changing from one checkered shirt into another.

125. Gotta give the thirsty af fandom what they're here for.

126. (Here for it.)

127. Also OMG Aria is definitely going to write the rest of Ezra's book for him.

128. I can't wait for Ezra's third book tbh "I only date small women: a memoir".

129. Only would Emily think she's nailing being shady af but then forget to shut the door behind her.

130. Ooooohhhhhhhhhhhh wait she's selling her eggs for money?

131. Because she's poor?

132. Is she forgetting that she grew up in what looks like one of the richest suburbs in Pennsylvania and all her friends live in McMansions?

133. What happened to all the money her dad left her?

134. Did she spend it all on lash extensions and flannel.

135. Also is that why her jacket has so many holes in the shoulders? Because she's poor?

136. Or is that a ~look~?

137. PS I did NOT see this storyline coming.

138. Good on you Pretty Little Liars for giving us a twist that we didn't see from a mile off.

139. It's just so… bizarre.

140. Aria is typing and looking shady, she is 100000000% writing this book for Ezra.

141. For fuck's sake, this girl is whipped.

142. Poor Liam, we hardly knew ye.

143. Pls let Lorenzo ask Hanna why the fuck she's wearing her dressing gown to questioning.

144. That's the biggest crime here and we all know it.

145. OMG everyone on this show is such a dummy.

146. Don't fucking lie.

147. And if you do, check the ice machine's location first.

148. For fuck's sake.

149. Also look at how smug Lorenzo looks for figuring this out.

150. Well done mate.

151. Where's Toby?

152. Where's Ali?!

153. WHERE'S WREN?

154. But what we really should be asking, is where the fuck is Mona?

155. How could Melissa tank her interview, she's usually so chill?

156. But oh man someone knows about Hanna deleting the tape.

157. It has to be Sara Harvey right?

158. Because she heard them in the spa.

159. UGH ALWAYS CHECK THE CUBICLES FOR SHOWER HARVEY, LADIES.

160. YES Emily is going to confront Sara!

161. I'm literally starting to think Sara Harvey has been at a How To Stop Slouching school for the past five years.

162. She is so ~straight~.

163. Straighter than she was last time she was alone with Emily, anyway.

164. Heh heh heh.

165. But also WHAT HAPPENED that Emily should feel guilty about?

166. Oh man look at these girls storming in and confronting Ezra.

167. Like… you have no proof of anything but you sure do have conviction.

168. But now we all know that there is no way it was Ezra because it's never the first person you suspect.

169. Or, on this show, the second, or the third, or the fourth, or the fifth…

170. Oooooooh Ezra's MAD.

171. This is like the time they found his lair.

172. God he's really lost it.

173. Yaaaassss Spencer and Caleb are talking yaaaasss jump on it Spence!

174. I wanna watch them make out so hard.

175. Omg are we about to get a flashback?

176. ANSWERS? YES PLEASE!

177. OK so, Emily pushing her into live wires was pretty justified, right?

178. I mean, remember when Emily literally shot someone dead?

179. Aria too.

180. Nobody got this messed up over those things.

181. "But did she die?" - Me about Sara Harvey rn.

182. This was made into a lot of a bigger deal than it actually is.

183. And can we talk about how bad the effects were in this scene?

184. Honestly it looks like a Snapchat filter.

185. The one where your eyes get blue lasers.

186. That was not much of a plot twist tbh.

187. Oh Spencer.

188. MASH YOUR FACE TOGETHER WITH CALEB'S IT'LL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER.

189. YES PAM drink that red wine.

190. Also yay Pam for being so supportive.

191. Poor old Em.

192. HANNA you need to stop hanging out with Shady Lucas!

193. He has weird untrustworthy eyes that dart around, and that MEANS something.

194. Also we have never gotten answers for his past shadiness. We need another summer of answers.

195. Liam just called Aria the book whisperer.

196. Lol more like the book WRITER.

197. Because she is definitely writing it for him.

198. OK, Spencer and Caleb are ALONE.

199. There is low lighting.

200. There is a fire.

201. They're talking about their feelings.

202. There is DEFINITELY going to be a kiss happening soon.

203. Please. Please. Please.

204. YAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!

205. This is so hot.

206. Controversial.

207. But hot.

208. Perfect song as well.

209. I am so here for this.

210. I'm more invested in their love lives than I am in my own.

211. Explains a lot tbh.

212. Emily y u pour out such good wine?

213. Wine Mom Pam won't be happy.

214. But also she just got a text.

215. It can't be...

216. Omg Hanna got a text too…

217. (While wistfully looking at a photo of Caleb and her.)

218. (I knew she wasn't OK with it.)

219. (BUT I AM).

220. Wow Spencer and Caleb are getting RAUNCHY.

221. I see why this channel isn't called ABC Family anymore tbh.

222. They're dry humping on the couch though, I thought they weren't meant to be 16 anymore?

223. Oh man, Spencer just got a text too.

224. IS A BACK?

225. OMG ARIA GOT A TEXT.

226. OMG ITS FROM A.

227. EXCEPT NOW ITS A WEIRD RED DEVIL EMOJI INSTEAD OF A.

228. OH SHIT I CAN'T EVEN HANDLE THIS I'M SO EXCITED.

229. Omg A's lair?

230. Omg it's the Alison mask.

231. AND A HOODIE!

232. Wait is this A's storage locker?

233. Or is this all the stuff that the police confiscated when they caught Charlotte?

234. Hmmmmmmm.

235. HMmmmmmmmmmmm.

236. HmmmmmmmmmmmmmmMmMmMmmMMmmmmMMMMMmmMMM.

237. Omg what an ending.

238. "Uniforms."

239. Lol Uber A, I thought you were super sleuth why you googling uniforms for you weirdo.

240. Also what kind of uniforms?

241. I am so confused.

242. And hoooooooooked.

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