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16 Drunk Meals Every Australian Has Had At Least Once

You're lying if you say you've never had Thai takeaway and goon before.

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1. The 1am pizza order.

asnesque / Via

Domino's is about to close and you're trying to get everyone to hurry the hell up and decide what toppings they want before it's too late. You always order way too much garlic bread, and a 1.25L Coke that no one wants.

2. The dirty kebab.

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It's 3.30am and you're on your way home, but not without stopping by the kebab place with the fluorescent lighting and dirty tiled floors. Garlic sauce is not optional, and you'll always pay that extra $1 for cheese.

3. The tray of oven food that you slather in tomato sauce.

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You rummage through the freezer for bags of potato gems, thick-cut chips, chicken nuggets, maybe even party pies or sausage rolls if you're lucky. The worst part is having to sit around waiting for it to cook.

4. The cold leftovers, eaten straight out of the container while standing in front of the fridge.

Twitter: @silent_rose76

You're either too tired or too wasted to heat it up, and leftover Chinese always tastes better cold anyway. You regret it in the morning when you have a sore stomach to match your sore head.


5. The Macca's drive thru in an Uber.

Twitter: @samanthalynnray

You promise to give your driver five stars if he swings past Macca's on the way back to your place. And if he's cool about it, your drunk generosity usually shouts him a small chips or frozen Coke to say thanks.

6. The dirty dumplings.

You know those BYO dumpling places which are totally fine with you getting shit-faced on a $5 bottle of Fifth Leg, so long as you keep ordering their rubbery pork and prawn dumplings? Yeah, sounds like a perfect Friday night to me too.

7. The overpriced drunk brunch.

Twitter: @IndigoYard

A boozy brunch always sounds like such a good idea, but suddenly you're three mimosas in and 100% fine with dropping $20 for a poached egg on wilted spinach. Hash browns are $7? Great, I'll have three! Do I want a Bloody Mary for $25? YES PLEASE!

8. The soggy chips from a takeaway joint.

Twitter: @lynseybarber

You've just finished a solid day drinking session – you've already eaten lunch, it's too early for dinner, but your drunk ass needs some more food. The chips come in a paper cup and somehow manage to be soggy and undercooked?


9. The pad Thai paired perfectly with your goon.

Twitter: @Dukes8125

You're pre-drinking shitty cheap wine before a night out, and need some fuel. You could put your Thai takeaway on a plate if you wish, but you know that this one is best eaten out of the plastic container while sitting on the living room floor.

10. The still-drunk Macca's breakfast.

Twitter: @Jazpster

You wake up at 8am after a GIANT night on the town, and realise you have less than an hour to get to class/work. After you get up and get dressed you realise you're definitely still drunk, and stumble into Macca's hoping a greasy McMuffin and hash brown will soak up some of the booze.

11. The overpriced pub feed.

@perthmunchkin / Via

You're in some posh wanky pub where every drink costs you $10 but you can't be bothered moving on to somewhere new. So you end up dropping way too much money on an outrageously-priced schnitty and chips which isn't anywhere near as good as the greasy kind that costs $12.

12. And the pub feed that'll probably give you food poisoning.

Twitter: @GordonRamsIsBae

On the other end of the spectrum, you find yourself in a really dodgy looking bar which has definitely seen better days. The food's cheap but... too cheap? You're drunk as hell though, off their $4.20 house wine, so you scarf down their soggy burger and hope for the best.


13. The thin-crust pizza at a fancy gastro pub.

Twitter: @nirmalla_hb

It's the weekend after pay day and you're ready to branch out and try that cool new place you saw on Urban List. But after three espresso martinis you're craving some food, and think pizza is a great idea. When it arrives, it's covered in rocket or parmesan shavings, and is so thin that all the toppings fall off when you pick it up by the crust.

14. The takeaway you snuck into a bar.

Twitter: @orihuelakat

You're pretty shitfaced, but not drunk enough to want to eat anything in the bar you're in. You're craving a burger or noodles, and you need it now. So you go out, get some takeaway from across the road, and sneak it back in hidden in your coat or bag. You sit in the corner eating it, getting your friends to block you from any staff seeing you.

15. The late-night Mi Goreng.

Twitter: @diijae

You and your mates get home after a wild night out and make a giant batch of Mi Goreng to devour while you all sit on the kitchen floor. Whether you add extra chilli sauce or fry an egg on top, it's never a bad choice.

16. And the Uber Eats overorder.

Twitter: @YesWeCrann

You're five wines into the evening and Uber Eats sounds like a great idea. But if you're paying $5 for delivery, then you may as well make the most of it right? Before you know it, you suddenly have a $50 bill and 20 spring rolls you didn't even really want.