Buzz·Posted on May 24, 2015How Many Of These Euphemisms For Male Masturbation Have You Heard?Here's a quiz. Try to BEAT IT.by Jean-Luc BouchardBuzzFeed StaffFacebookPinterestTwitterMailLink No one's around, right? Cool, let's have some fun. Monkeybusinessimages / Getty Images Please check off all the euphemisms for male masturbation that you recognize. Spanking the monkey Check Spanking the monkey Five finger shuffle Check Five finger shuffle Making the bald man cry Check Making the bald man cry Poaching your egg Check Poaching your egg Shaking hands with Dr. Winky Check Shaking hands with Dr. Winky Beating your meat Check Beating your meat Blowing your own horn Check Blowing your own horn Battling the purple-headed yogurt slinger Check Battling the purple-headed yogurt slinger Riding the mayonnaise surf Check Riding the mayonnaise surf Shucking corn Check Shucking corn Waxing your carrot Check Waxing your carrot Tugging the slug Check Tugging the slug Windsurfing on Mount Baldy Check Windsurfing on Mount Baldy Debugging the hard drive Check Debugging the hard drive Auditioning your hand puppet Check Auditioning your hand puppet Oozing your noodle Check Oozing your noodle Squirt hockey Check Squirt hockey Hand shandy Check Hand shandy Smoosh smoosh Check Smoosh smoosh Burping the worm Check Burping the worm Wanking Check Wanking Pocket pinball Check Pocket pinball Badgering the witness Check Badgering the witness Celebrating Palm Sunday Check Celebrating Palm Sunday Making magic with leftovers Check Making magic with leftovers Pulling the Pope Check Pulling the Pope Wrestling the eel Check Wrestling the eel Liquidating the inventory Check Liquidating the inventory Hoisting your own petard Check Hoisting your own petard Fishing with dynamite Check Fishing with dynamite Beef Strokenoff Check Beef Strokenoff Jerkin' the gherkin Check Jerkin' the gherkin Cooking cucumbers Check Cooking cucumbers Consulting Dr. Jackoff Check Consulting Dr. Jackoff Tipping off the inspector Check Tipping off the inspector Much a goo about nothing Check Much a goo about nothing Looking for clues with Fred and Daphne Check Looking for clues with Fred and Daphne Discovering your own potential Check Discovering your own potential Shuffling your iPod Check Shuffling your iPod Strangling the Cyclops Check Strangling the Cyclops Buffing the Vampire Slayer Check Buffing the Vampire Slayer Making Pearl Jam Check Making Pearl Jam Meeting the Goopman at midnight Check Meeting the Goopman at midnight Seasoning your meatloaf Check Seasoning your meatloaf Practicing politics Check Practicing politics Hunting for Red October Check Hunting for Red October Tossing egg salad Check Tossing egg salad Crying on the toilet Check Crying on the toilet 23 skidoo Check 23 skidoo The tartar sauce rainbow Check The tartar sauce rainbow Show me my results!