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15 Haikus Written By Frat Bros

Gotta pass Comp 101 somehow, brah!

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1. On Love

Light cast through the pane

and I, a super chill dude,

just want your digits.

2. On Style

Shorts for cargo-ing

shirts for polo-ing, prepared

to golf anytime.

3. On Recreation

All work and no pong

make Josh a dull bro. But don't

hog the table, not cool.


4. On Pride

Chad said I'm totes rad.

But if I think Chad's a tool,

is my radness false?

5. On Toil

Homework is mad lame.

That prof is such a dickweed.

My sweat feeds sorrow.

6. On The Change of Seasons

Spring into summer,

the sun a bright, smiling God,

the chicks mackable.


7. On Hot Stephanie from Sigma Iota Alpha

Could you ever dream

of a lovelier orchid

than hot Steph, brosef?

8. On Art

There are no greater

Earth-bound creators of song:

Slim Shady, Wu Tang.

9. On Mortality

Chad dares me to jump

off the roof. Do I dream of

flight, or piss my shorts?


10. On Ethics

Todd scores us some weed.

Ancestors bemoan my sin.

Bro, my hands? So big.

11. On Tradition

Natty over Bud,

Quiznos over Subway, and

all souls are joyous.

12. On Rivalry

Beta Theta Pi

thinks they're so cool. But he who

laughs last laughs krunkly.


13. On Ceremony

"Who." The word escapes

my wavering, beer-soaked lips.

"Who do you know here?"

14. On Identity

Judge not a man by

decals on his cap, but by

how backwards it is.

15. On Time

Minutes wither, die.

Nothing lasts longer than hope

that hot Steph texts back.