Amy Winehouse 1983-2011
by Jeffery Lowman
I'm a sure that enough people have their opinions, and some may even in fact laugh at the death of Amy. In many ways, this was a train wreck that was preventable, yet almost unavoidable. Anytime an artist dies while in their prime, we often shake our heads and wonder why. The list could go on and on and on. To name just a few, oh and many of them, we know why they died. John Belushi, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, Bille Holiday, James Dean, Michael Jackson, Elvis Presley, and the list just goes on and on and on.
Picture a smokey room, in the 1960's, where some mellow horn music plays, the lights on the stage create a bluish tint. The band begins a slow jazzy song. The artist on stage utters the first words to the first verse, and the audience is stunned, shocked. Goosebumps ripple through their skin, forcing their way to the surface. A smokey voice pulls on the audience's heart strings, because like the artist, they have been their before. The depravity of life, is something we all have in common. In 1960, this would have been Etta James, or Billie Holiday, perhaps Ella Fitzgerald, or Sarah Vaughn, or heck even Dinah Washington. Amy Winehouse would have fit in with that crowd. She had that vibe about her. Her smokey, heart wrenching voice, would have encased her audience in guilt, shame and a real sense of belonging and pain.
For an artist to sing, is one thing. Trendy poppy songs come and go. Some remain a tradition and we never forget the words, even if years go by without physically hearing it. It's a rare quality for an artist to have such an incredible gift, which hasn't been engineered by studio hancho's. For example, Britney Spears is enginerred. She couldn't win American Idol if her life depended on it. She simply is, and always was an attractive girl, who made dicks hard. She has no real talent, and has proved over time, that the trainwreck comes for in her terms of lip-service, and lip-syncing.
Billie Holiday was one of a kind. However her crack, and heroin addiction took her out of the this world. If you listen to any Billie Holiday Cd, you will find, her voice speaks for a generation, and her subtle pauses in pitch and phrase tell an all too familiar story. Pain, grief and hurt. Amy Winehouse had a voice, that could transcend the masses, and she could pitch and phrase like those of her past. She was not just some "dumb jew twit from the east end of London", as many have said.
She not only had quick rises, and epic falls, but she had something I don't believe we will ever see again, nor have we actually ever truly seen before. We saw a girl, who was jaded, hurt, grief stricken, and in the dumps time and time and time again. She was real. Her image wasn't crafted. She was Amy Winehouse, and fuck anyone who said otherwise. In the days of "standard image", she was against the grain. She did what she wanted, both publically and privately. She lived her life as if tomorrow wasn't coming, so she had better enjoy the moment. Some may argue that her destructiveness, led to all of this. It did in many many ways.
The social distortion, and media corruption want to play the other game. They want to call her a whore, a junkie, and a bum, and they don't want you to enjoy her music, nor do they want you to mourn the loss of at the end of day, just a girl who had raw talent, whose issues manifested themselves in so many catastrophic ways. Just because Amy was in the the spotlight, many forget how human she really was. She was put on an imaginary pedistal, by people who put artists above the standard, and they act intolerably cruel to the same artist they loved, when something like this happens.
Her songs were about her. Sinatra is the only other artist I feel that sang songs true to his emotions, and feelings, and I dare anyone to say otherwise. They chose songs that reflected them, their most inner thoughts, feelings, and demons.
Amy Winhouse may have died of a drug overdose. Probably did. She made no secret of her hard partying ways, or her desire to go out young. She often said "If I died tomorrow, I would be happy". She had fullfilled many things she wanted, but it's what other people wanted for her that causes resentment and bitterness. Legendary status is a word I don't throw around at all, and it doesn't apply to Amy. She was not legendary, nor ever will be. Her life and career was cut too short to ever know, if she would have attained that status. She had the tools, the voice that would have propelled her their, if she could have kept her demons in check.
For me the tragedyy, and I have heard people say it's not a tragedy because she was a "junkie", and you know thats complete bullshit. It is a tragedy, anytime a girl dies young. Would you tell a cancer patient who dies at age 8 not a tragedy? Sure their is a difference. One is self indulgence, vs. your body turning on you. But many people believe addiction is as simple as putting it down, quitting. They don't realize it is every bit as mental as physical. We drink to numb our pain, our indecurities, our failures, and our achievements. It's not as simple as growing up, and getting over it. Many addicts have the same innate core problems. Low-self esteem, low self-worth, low self-vaule, and thats not something that changes because you think it's so simple, but I haven't heard one single person say that.
She could have been helped. She could have gotten better, and there will be those, who will say she was a junkie, and it was her choice. In many ways, it is true, she chose, but you know, the complications, and the mental abuse many people suffer, are paramount to the drug we ingest, or the booze we sip, or the pill we swallow. She was alone when she died. That is public fact. To me thats sad. The hanger-ons were gone, the party people had other things to do, and this girl died very very alone. Nobody should die alone.
She could have been helped. There are things you can do, that others can do, to forcibly make you go to Rehab, or even jail. Too many people stood by not as Amy Winhouse the jazz singer died, but as Amy Winhouse the girl died. I blame them, I blame her. I blame all those who knew, and did nothing but complain, and bitch about her being out of control. When you love someone as a friend or lover, there in nothing in the this world that could keep me from not doing whatever I had to, to ensure that a life is not taken or stolen. It's not my job, but it's natural, it's innate.
So Amy, you have entered into the realm of questions, jokes, and you have shown a generation how to sing, and how to epically fall. You were not just a raw talented artist, you were simply a girl with sorrow, and demons. But you chose how to live, and showed millions how not to live. It is through your chaotic and endearing life, that you have more than likely changed lives. You taught us to rebell against the system, to show the world that we can be individuals, and go against the very fringe that wants bubble gum singers, and trendy catch-phrases. You lived as you died. But in final, know that your voice will move masses, and your voice will always remind me, that it's okay being me, because I'm not perfect, I hurt, and somewhere in between dark storms their is a rainbow. Rest In Peace-
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