The Top Ten Reasons Why You, BuzzFeed, Should Hire Me

Working at BuzzFeed would be my dream job! I recently applied for a position at your offices, and I think (and hope) this post will give me a little something extra over my competition. Sincerely, James C. Lane

1. I am extremely well-liked by everyone.

2. I treat my co-workers like family.

3. I excel and perform each task I am given to outstanding results.

4. I am quiet, courteous, and respectful in an office setting.

5. I am pretty funny and can make anyone laugh.

6. I am always the first to add interesting ideas to a discussion.

7. I will spend the entire day working. I love being continuously busy.

8. I type 87 words per minute.

9. I treat everyone, especially my superiors, with respect and admiration.

10. I can even stay late and work on the weekends because I am single.