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What Kind Of Pooper Are You?

Everyone does it butt not everyone does it the same. Want to learn more about poop?

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  1. Why do you likely have to poop in the first place?

    I just had coffee.
    I just had coffee.
    I tried to talk to my crush.
    I tried to talk to my crush.
    I ate Chipotle.
    I ate Chipotle.
    Because I always have to poop at 7:30am.
    Because I always have to poop at 7:30am.
  2. What is your favorite alternative word for feces?

    Doodie
    Doodie
    Sh*t
    Sh*t
    Number 2
    Number 2
    Crap
    Crap
  3. What excuse do you use when you need to poop?

    "I need to make a phone call."
    "I need to check on something."
    "I need to use the bathroom."
    "Yeah... I gotta take a shit, hold on."
  4. The worst thing about public pooping is:

    The sound.
    The sound.
    The idea that everyone knows you, too, poop.
    The idea that everyone knows you, too, poop.
    The smell.
    The smell.
    When someone doesn't want to come look at your poop afterwards.
    When someone doesn't want to come look at your poop afterwards.
  5. Do you fold, crumple or roll?

    Crumple
    Crumple
    Fold
    Fold
    Ehh... neither?
    Ehh... neither?
    Roll
    Roll
  6. Which bathroom looks the most appealing?

    This one.
    This one.
    This is pretty cool!
    This is pretty cool!
    I'll take it.
    I'll take it.
    I love this one!
    I love this one!
  7. What do you do while on the can?

    Read a magazine/my iPhone
    Read a magazine/my iPhone
    Focus on the task at hand.
    Focus on the task at hand.
    Try to not break my squat stance.
    Try to not break my squat stance.
    I've been known to eat, drink, brush my teeth, etc, etc.
    I've been known to eat, drink, brush my teeth, etc, etc.
  8. How do you like to cover-up the sound of your poop?

    With the water faucet
    With the water faucet
    Playing music in the bathroom
    Playing music in the bathroom
    Talking over the noise
    Talking over the noise
    Why would I do ANY of those things?
    Why would I do ANY of those things?
  9. Which one of these has/would totally happen to you?

    Straight up sh*tting your pants.
    Straight up sh*tting your pants.
    Clogging in the toilet at a one-bathroom party.
    Clogging in the toilet at a one-bathroom party.
    Pooping in your purse.... and tweeting about it.
    Pooping in your purse.... and tweeting about it.
    ALL OF THESE.
    ALL OF THESE.

What Kind Of Pooper Are You?

You got: Marshall Eriksen aka A Whippy Pooper

Congrats! You're the nice guy who wants to poop last. Literally. You're a master at waiting for the other person to relieve their business, so you can RIP—relieve in peace. Everyone in the office thinks you're nice but wishes you would stop asking how their weekend was—you both know you don't care. But hey, you are a people pleaser, and that's why nearly everyone who comes across you thinks you're an OK guy or gal! :)

Marshall Eriksen aka A Whippy Pooper Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF
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You got: Megan from BRIDESMAIDS aka A Straight Sh*tter

Your opinions and personality are a lot like your pooping style: loud, noticeable, you can't hold it in. You're not one to pretend sh*t doesn't stink when it does, and won't be anything than 100% you! Which is why you aren't shy when it comes to taking a dump—it's natural and everyone does it. Even Beyonce.

Megan from BRIDESMAIDS aka A Straight Sh*tter Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF
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You got: The Poo~Pourri Girl aka A Girlie Pooper

Like her (watch here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKLnhuzh9uY) you are sassy and classy. Your pooping is like your favorite LBD: mostly left to the imagination. You likely spray this product before dropping a deuce and go about your business like nothing ever happened. After all, you are a lady! And as the video jokes, girls don't poop.

The Poo~Pourri Girl aka A Girlie Pooper
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You got: Angie from Baby Mama aka The Worst Kind of Pooper

You're the uncle we all hope we never have at our Thanksgiving dinner. You ask people to pull your finger, and you gift everyone with Whoopie cushions for Christmas. From everyone you love, stop.

Angie from Baby Mama aka The Worst Kind of Pooper
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