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21 Things Servers Are Tired Of Hearing

It's server not servant.

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1. "I don't believe in tipping."

Bad Hat Harry Productions

It's not a political ideology, or a religion, it's how servers earn their money.

2. "Do you mind splitting the bill 13 ways?"

instagram.com

No, not at all. (screams internally)

3. "You don't like your uniform?"

Between the shirts smelling like meat, name tags, and the oh-so-fashionable non-slip shoes, what's not to like?
20th Century Fox

Between the shirts smelling like meat, name tags, and the oh-so-fashionable non-slip shoes, what's not to like?

4. "Are you still open?"

instagram.com

Well it is 9:58, but I don't mind getting out of work an hour late for just one table.

5. "The customers can't be that bad."

instagram.com

Not all customers are bad, but some do leave interesting notes.

6. "What kind of food do you have here?"

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Well it's a pizza place so....

7. "Do you mind if I substitute (cheap item) for (expensive item)?"

Miramax Pictures

I see what you're trying to do, and I do not approve.

8. "We have coupons."

Bravo

Here comes a lousy tip.

9. "I know the owner."

Columbia Pictures

Coincidentally so do I.

10. "What is your roast beef made out of?"

Bravo

My guess is beef.

11. "Could you make sure that comes out quickly? We're kind of in a hurry."

instagram.com

If you're in a hurry, maybe a sit-down restaurant isn't your best option.

12. "Hey you!"

FX

I have a name, I said it when you first sat down, and unfortunately it isn't "you."

13. "I've been waiting for my food for 10 minutes already!"

NBC

Waiting 10 minutes on a well-done steak really isn't a long time.

14. "Why am I getting charged for this?"

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Nothing in life is free.

15. "I want to speak to your manager."

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You might be pretty upset, but it's more likely you're just trying to get some freebies.

16. "You're still coming to work, right?" (In the midst of an apocalyptic blizzard.)

Sure thing boss, right after I dig my car out of the snow.
reddit.com

Sure thing boss, right after I dig my car out of the snow.

17. "You have it made, you get tips and a paycheck."

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At $2.13 an hour, I'm a practically made of money.

18. "Hi, how are you doing tonight?" (Customer immediately says drink order.)

instagram.com

A simple "hello" or "hi" back would really go a long way.

19. "You don't mind if we stay a while, do you?"

instagram.com

Sure, you're only limiting my ability to either go home or make more money, so it's OK.

20. “If you don’t like working there, why don’t you find another job?”

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Because bills don't pay themselves.

21. "Being a server must be easy."

instagram.com

Between dealing with customers and staff, multitasking, and being on your feet all day, it's one of the most difficult jobs you'll ever have.

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