1. On family betrayals:
How RUDE is it when u fill the kettle then when u leave it to boil someone else uses ur water !!!! Great British snake off in ma house like
2. On British teachers:
Is your teacher really a teacher in Britain if they don't say "UHHHHH, XCUSE MAY!" 😭
3. On sandwiches:
English people will dead put anything in a sandwich. Fish fingers, chips, crisps, sausages. You name it, it's going in the fucking bread
4. On small victories:
When your mum sends you to the chippy to get some chips and doesn't ask for her change back
5. On "pudding":
rest of the world: *through tears* p-please... you can’t just make everything pudding england: *points at food* pudding
6. On going out:
are u even british if u don’t say “out out” when u mean going to a club
7. On P.E. lessons:
8. On going to Nando's:
When you're in the toilet at Nandos and no one's looking
9. On the pronunciation of "scone" debate:
10. On small talk:
Are you even English if you don't ask your taxi driver if they've been busy tonight
11. On compliments:
Responses you will get if you tell a British girl you like her dress: - Exactly how much it was - If it was in the sale - If it has pockets
12. On TV:
ITV2: We Played The Mummy Returns 3 times this month ITV2 to ITV2: Play it again
13. On supermarket shopping:
That middle aisle in Aldi is mental. Went in for fruit and veg almost come out with a new curtain rail, garden hose and bamboo dinner set
14. On strange quirks:
Wonder when you stop using 'year above' to say someone's age 🤔
15. On making plans:
16. On old-school decor:
Imagine being part of the generation that could afford to buy a decent home and then choosing to massacre it with t… https://t.co/MczgK1rs7H
17. On polite conversation:
Everyone in England - Person A - 'alright mate, how's it going?' Person B - (lying) 'yeah good, you?' Person A - (also lying) 'yeah good'
18. On our finest institution:
19. On public transport:
20. On holidays:
Are you even British if you don't give your lilo to some kid when ur going home from holiday ?
21. On the North/South divide:
londoner: hi northerner: hiGH like your house prices 😂😂 honestly you couldn't pay me to live in london 🙅🙅 enjoy your smog-infested bubble 👋🏻
22. And on 2017:
Britain 2017.