41 Little Things That Never Fail To Ruin A British Person's Day
"Unexpected item in the bagging area."
1. Being in charge of the remote at someone’s house.
2. Someone making your tea with too much milk.
3. Dropping a biscuit in your tea.
4. Trying to save it with another one, which then falls in too.
5. The words “unexpected item in the bagging area”.
6. Getting a phone call that turns out to be about PPI.
7. When you’re off sick and get to watch This Morning, but Phil and Holly aren’t hosting it that day.
8. Accidentally seeing a spoiler for an American TV show on Twitter.
9. Going into Primark to buy socks and walking out with new underwear, two sets of pyjamas, new bedding, and some scented candles.
10. The weather being too warm for a jacket but too cold to not wear one.
11. Forgetting all the carrier bags you hoard at home so having to buy more Bags For Life.
12. Or going in with bags from a rival supermarket and feeling like a traitor.
13. Forgetting your Nando’s card when you go there.
14. And being the one who has to do all the refills.
15. A bus driver mistakenly thinking you’re waiting for their bus and stopping for you so you have to shake your head and avoid eye contact.
16. Accidentally pressing the stop button one stop too early.
17. Going on a bus with a £10 note and feeling like the worst person in the world.
18. Burning your mouth on a Greggs pasty.
19. People queueing from the wrong side so there’s now two queues and you can’t be certain you’re in the right one.
20. When you’re in a checkout queue and realise you’ve forgotten something, but you don’t trust anyone to hold your place.
21. Eating a Flake and getting chocolate smears over everything.
22. Going to buy a Freddo and seeing the price has gone up again.
23. Getting an email that says “regards” instead of “kind regards” and wondering what you did to upset them.
24. Trying out a new brand of teabags and then realising it was a big mistake.
25. Going to a big train station and having to pay 50p for a wee.
26. The words “this train will split at the next station”.
27. `Feeling obliged to buy a drink you don’t want because it’s part of a meal deal.
28. Or all the good sandwiches being gone.
29. A pound getting stuck in your shopping trolley.
30. “Popping to the Post Office” at lunch and ending up in a queue for 45 minutes.
31. Wanting to take the last biscuit but not wanting to be judged.
32. Buying a train ticket and it not even getting checked.
33. Your sarcasm being mistaken for sincerity.
34. A football or rugby game running over and throwing your TV schedule out of sync.
35. The supermarket rearranging its layout so you end up getting lost looking for pasta sauce.
36. Flipping your fish fingers too early so the coating gets stuck to the baking tray.
37. A small amount of snow shutting down all public transport.
38. Going to a restaurant and having your order messed up, and then lying and saying it was fantastic if any staff ask you.
39. Being greeted with “hey, you alright?” and saying it right back.
40. Hearing “can you move down?” when you’re on a packed bus or train.
41. Finding out that someone has eaten all the Teasers in a Celebrations tub.