16 Embarrassing Plane Horror Stories That'll Make You Never Want To Fly Again
"In one of the turbulences, we could not hold it anymore and...connect the dots. We shit our pants on the plane."
1. The period, puke, and poop shambles:
"The most recent plane journey I had was around four hours long but it felt like a hundred. To start everything off, I started my period mid-plane journey. It was really early so I didn't have anything on me. The worst thing is that I didn't realise so I bled on my clothes and on the seat. I was able to clean myself up and the seat, and I had a jacket i could put around my waist.
"It only goes downhill from here. After eating the food, I didn't feel too good. I had to rush to the toilet many times to empty my bowels. Everyone was looking at me and definitely knew what was happening. One of the last times I had to run to the toilet, I threw up between the seats where everyone walks. To top it off, I slipped in it and fell on the floor on my way back! It was just a disaster!"
2. The mortifying misunderstanding:
"It was my first day working as a cabin crew member. A woman asked me if I could warm up her baby’s bottle. I asked my colleagues if they could help me warm it up. After ten minutes my funny male colleague came to me and said 'here’s the mommy’s dildo, please tell her it’s warm now.' As a native Spanish speaker I didn’t know what dildo means, but it sounded like a 'kids word' so I went to the cabin and in front of everyone I said 'here’s your warm dildo.' That was nine years ago and I remember it like yesterday."
3. The absolute disaster:
"When I was 13 I was traveling as an unaccompanied minor. It had been a pretty bumpy ride from the start so I held off going to the bathroom until I absolutely had to. When I couldn’t wait any longer I got up and started walking to the bathroom, but unfortunately the plane chose that moment to hit a massive patch of turbulence which literally knocked me over in the middle of the aisle. To add insult to injury, the oxygen masks dropped and everyone panicked, causing one guy to fling his glass of red wine off his tray and all over me. I started crying. I may or may not have peed a little bit. I’m still embarrassed about the whole thing to this day."
4. The dramatic diaper-change:
"Our three-month-old son had a massive poop-splosion that resulted in us having to lie him down in the aisle and cut his clothes off him. The bathroom was just too small for all the manoeuvring around we had to do."
5. The louder-than-expected gas:
"When I was maybe five or six I was on a plane to Arizona. I was and still am a pretty gassy person, so stuff was about to go down. The overall plane ride was fine until the end. I farted...like really loudly. There were two men talking in Spanish I believe? Yeah, they just stopped along with the WHOLE ENTIRE PLANE and stared at me. I think that’s what ties in as to why I have social anxiety."
6. The unexpected Aunt Flo visit
"When I was 13, I didn’t realise I’d started my period on the plane. I was wearing my Victoria’s Secret sweatpant capris and just got off the plane on my way to use the bathroom at the terminal, and noticed that there was blood all over my pants. I bled through onto the seat and walked through the airport without even knowing what I had done. They were destroyed, I had to throw them away after that."
7. The double embarrassment:
"En route to the Dominican Republic, I suffered a HORRIFIC stomach bug. Unfortunately, I was seated next to a complete stranger. Nausea struck and I reached for the barf bag to *ahem* barf. As I am a lady, I turned away from said stranger to barf, but the vomit was so forceful, I ended up farting on her mid-barf. She moved seats. Probably changed flights too."
8. The silent but violent:
"I was on a plane from London to Berlin once and my seat happened to be right next to Jena Malone. She's was one of my favourite actresses (still is actually) and I was so starstruck but I also really needed to fart. I decided the best thing to do would be to go the toilet. She very kindly stepped out of her seat so that I could pass, but as I did I farted right in front of her. It wasn't loud but it did smell and she definitely knew it was me."
9. The unfortunately-timed stomach bug:
"I was flying solo from Washington D.C. to Tokyo to visit my cousin and her boyfriend. I ordered chicken teriyaki as my in-flight meal and the first bite told me something was a little off. I ended up with awful food poisoning and proceeded to barf on the innocent passenger next to me. The flight attendants were adamant that I had swine flu (which was spreading like wildfire in 2009) so they made me wear a face mask and took my temperature. I kept trying to explain it was the chicken but the non-stop barfing wasn’t helping. My cousin’s boyfriend got a phone call a few days later from the airline, asking if I had tested positive for swine flu."
10. The emotional outpouring:
"Okay, so there was one flight I went on from Canada to Germany, and I knew I wasn't going to sleep because, HELLO, so many movies to watch for in-flight entertainment. So I was scrolling through the selections and was feeling nostalgic and I started watching Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey.
"Well, I guess I forgot just how emotional the ending gets (no spoilers!) but I was BAWLING my eyes out by the end of the movie, and I get a tap on the shoulder from the guy next to me asking if I was okay and if he needed to get the flight attendant for me! Needless to say I just told him I was fine, it was just the movie, but the guy seemed so concerned and then was awkward to me for the rest of the EIGHT-HOUR flight that I just never looked in his direction."
11. The laxatives that worked too well:
"This didn’t happen to me but I was with someone when this happened. My grandpa had been a bit 'backed up' and my grandma gave him some laxatives and stool softeners the night before our flight. Well, he didn’t make it to the bathroom and ended up crapping his pants in his seat. He didn’t tell anyone and the entire plane smelled so bad! Once we landed he asked me to text my mother and ask her to bring him some pants. That’s when I realised what happened."
12. The proud declarations:
"I was traveling to Saudi Arabia with my then three-year-old daughter. All was going well until the smell hit me. I glanced at my daughter and asked her if she needed the toilet. She responded with 'no, I'm just gassy.' She proceeded to fart off and on the whole flight while proudly announcing it each time she let loose. My neighbours were not happy."
13. The vomit explosion:
"Long story short, I traveled to India, accidentally drank the water, and was sick for weeks after. On the fight home, I began to feel queasy and could not find a sick bag, so I put my call light on but no help ever came. After what felt like an eternity, my body decided it was done waiting so I ended up throwing up in my hands. As if that wasn't bad enough, my hands couldn't contain everything and some of it landed on the two (sleeping) people sitting on either side of me. I didn't speak either of their languages so I had no way to explain/apologise once they woke up. Also I got to spend the rest of the twenty-four-hour trip home covered in vomit which was super fun and not uncomfortable at all!"
14. The frequent flatulence:
"The morning of my flight home from Athens, I woke up with all the symptoms of food poisoning. The flight was a nightmare; nausea, vomiting, diarrhoea, headache, etc. But what I WASN’T prepared for was the HORRIFIC flatulence. It smelled absolutely terrible, and there was nothing I could do to help it. I tried to go to the bathroom and let it out there, but sometimes it just...happened. I felt so terrible for the person sitting next to me. I apologised profusely and they were really kind, but I’m sure it was miserable for them."
– Melanie Schneiderman via Facebook
15. The moment shit hit the fan:
"On a trip back from Bali to Paris, I got massive diarrhoea on the plane because for the past weeks, I had been eating super spicy food. I tried to hold it and told my boyfriend – turned out he had also been holding his diarrhoea explosion too. We were both dying and in one of the turbulences, we could not hold it anymore, and...connect the dots. We shit our pants on the plane. Safe to say we won't eat spicy food nor fly for some time."
16. The cough that turned into something more than a cough:
"I had the runs on the plane. I had a really bad case of the stomach flu and it came two days before we had to leave Canada. I couldn't keep anything down or inside of me. So the morning of the flight, my mom plied me with ginger tea and some crackers. I felt a little better, but during the flight, my stomach started to rumble and I had to go to the bathroom really bad. By the time I got there it was occupied and I couldn't hold it anymore. I gave a cough and pooped my pants right there. I was about ten and just started crying and screaming for my mom. Let's just say it was an experience."
– Tammy Taitt via Facebook
Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.