For the last time tía, I'm working on myself and don't want a novio!
"I choose being single, because I love being alive."
«Je passerais le reste de ma vie à tes côtés, si seulement tu aimais la sodomie.»
"I would spend the rest of my life with you, if only you liked anal sex."
"Don't be fucking rude!"
"Hi This Is The Guy Who Visited Your Animal Crossing Campsite From 2 Nights Ago. Just Want 2 Let You Know I Have Feelings For You"
"Damn, I'm loving this $13 beer," said no one ever.