A proposed EU ban on super-strength kitchen appliances, including toasters and kettles, has been paused after a UKIP MEP said he wants the UK to leave the EU because his toaster repeatedly produces rubbish toast.
A senior EU official said it was important to be "sensitive to the British obsession with water kettles," according to The Financial Times.
David Coburn, UKIP Scotland's only elected representative, claimed that EU regulation means toasters are only allowed to have "the power of one candle or something" and he said he may be forced to make toast on an open fire should the UK remain in the EU after June's referendum.
"Don't you know about these EU toasters? They've turned them all down and that's why you can't get decent toast," claimed the MEP. "Mine's on full boost and my bread's all peely-wally, it's awful. My old toaster seemed to be powered by the Torness nuclear reactor and this one is powered by some kind of EU windmill."
Coburn cited reports in the Daily Express in late 2014 that there were EU "plans to look at the energy usage" of certain kitchen appliances. Although it has imposed restrictions on the sale of high-powered vacuum cleaners, the European Commission denied that high-energy toasters have ever been outlawed. Coburn insists his toaster is not broken.
Asked to describe how his toast looks on the first toasting attempt, the MEP said: "It's very, very raw. I like my toast cremated, I don't like it looking like it's been cooked in the Antarctic on an ice float."
Going into further detail, Coburn described the second attempt at toasting he is forced to go through every morning: "It's not even brown. It takes about four goes until it looks even vaguely brown, never mind toasted, it's just a pale brown. I hardly ever get it the way I want it."
Coburn claimed he was getting complaints from "all of [his] constituents" about the "peely-wally machines", and he said his toaster will be one of the issues he will raise during his campaign to win back British sovereignty in 23 June's referendum.
"The entire European campaign is central to the fact that the Scottish and UK parliaments don't have any power," said the MEP. "I want to get power back to Westminster and Holyrood then we can get some proper toasters."
He added: "Among other things."
The European Commission seemed baffled by Coburn's claims on toaster regulation when approached by BuzzFeed News, and said any future changes to electrical regulations would not affect the performance of household appliances such as toasters.