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21 School Lunches You’ll Thankfully Never Eat Again

Potato smilies just look so unsettling.

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1. A bland sponge cake with some pink custard to jazz up proceedings.

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The pink custard was there to visually trick your tastebuds into thinking that what you were eating actually had some flavour to it. It didn't.

2. Incredibly resilient sausages that were almost impossible to cut.

If you cut them in the middle both sides would just pop up like a reverse drawbridge.
Flickr: lexnger / Creative Commons

If you cut them in the middle both sides would just pop up like a reverse drawbridge.

3. Apple crumble that was mostly crumble.

The lack of apples was made all the more annoying by the fact there was an apple tree right outside the canteen.
Flickr: m3cfa / Creative Commons

The lack of apples was made all the more annoying by the fact there was an apple tree right outside the canteen.

4. The now infamous turkey twizzler.

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We all hassle Jamie Oliver for taking these away from us, but let's be honest, we'd never want to eat them again.

5. A rogue pie that raised more questions than answers.

It kind of had the resemblance of a pie, but the filling was a mystery.
Flickr: casamatita / Creative Commons

It kind of had the resemblance of a pie, but the filling was a mystery.

6. A mostly jamless jam roly-poly with custard.

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Should have just been called a roly-poly to tbh.

7. An unsettling mob of potato smileys, usually served with baked beans.

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Why were they smiling???

8. Rice pudding with a tiny teaspoon of jam in the centre.

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That dollop of jam in the centre was iconic, but it didn't make up for the fact that rice pudding is granny food.

9. A very basic square-shaped pizza.

Pizza should only come in two shapes: Round when it's fresh from the oven, and triangle after it's been sliced.
Flickr: jessicamullen / Creative Commons

Pizza should only come in two shapes: Round when it's fresh from the oven, and triangle after it's been sliced.

10. A lazy fruit salad poured haphazardly into a bowl.

The laziest of all prepared school means – it literally came straight from the can.
Flickr: geographypages / Creative Commons

The laziest of all prepared school means – it literally came straight from the can.

11. The controversial combination of chicken drummers and spaghetti hoops.

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Beans definitely would have gone better with drummers.

12. A sad, tired looking Christmas dinner.

The only thing that made it different from a regular roast dinner was tiny bit of cranberry sauce.
Flickr: hddod / Creative Commons

The only thing that made it different from a regular roast dinner was tiny bit of cranberry sauce.

13. Lumpy mash potato.

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At some point during the meal's preparation the cook just thought "fuck it" and probably went for a cigarette out back.

14. A semi-defrosted arctic roll.

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You either love it or you hate it.

15. Cottage pie or shepherd's pie – you were never sure which.

The chances are that the school didn't know either. The only thing you knew for certain was that it was a little mash heavy.
Flickr: seelensturm / Creative Commons

The chances are that the school didn't know either. The only thing you knew for certain was that it was a little mash heavy.

16. Turkey dinosaurs that you were specifically told not to play with.

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Why shape food like a T-Rex and then shout when people march the across your plate making "rawr" noises.

17. Chips that either had the consistency of concrete or of wet cement.

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They were alway too soggy or too hard – NEVER in between.

18. The mildest curry in the history of human existence.

It had almost no flavour and was essentially just slop.
Flickr: dippy_duck

It had almost no flavour and was essentially just slop.

19. Potato cubes even though there were already enough carbs on the plate.

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Another from the dinner lady's preferred culinary style of cubism.

20. Rectangular veg for some unexplained reason.

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Seriously, what is it with dinner ladies and squares?

21. A lackluster iced bun.

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Literally just a bread roll with a bit of icing on top. Try again.