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16 Of The Most Horrific Things People Have Seen At British Festivals

Fucking hell.

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We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us the worst thing they've witnessed at a British festival. Here are some of the most bizarre, disgusting, and downright depraved answers.

1. Water games

"Reading Festival in the 90's: A guy had filled his Super Soaker with piss to shoot at Daphne and Celeste."

Submitted by Kat Brahms, Facebook

2. Sinning in the rain

"At Leeds Festival 2010, a guy pulled down his pants and started pooing in a nearby bin. He then proceeded to come to our table, grab my brolley and attempt to wipe his bum with it. Safe to say I didn't want my brolley back."

Submitted by Rebekah McHale, Facebook

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3. Jurassick park

"Met a man who genuinely believed he had turned into a dinosaur. He said he was finding life difficult because his arms were too short."

Submitted by rosieneedsphotos

4. Dog's dinner

"I saw some teenagers eating what I suspect was a badger at Leeds Festival in 2002. There are at least two eyewitnesses who saw this. It was either a badger or a dog."

Submitted by psmith

5. Chasing waterfalls

"At Reading in 2009 the urinals in the main arena area were overflowing, so of course one guy drank from the piss waterfall as a bet."

Submitted by Nick Hembrey, Facebook

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6. Multi-tasking

"I was at Rockness Festival in Inverness, ordering a beer at the bar. Stood next to me is a Glaswegian, kilt up, having a piss against the bar whilst also ordering a beer at the same time."

Submitted by Adam Stephenson, Facebook

7. High on the shoulders of giants

"Someone did coke off my shoulder at Reading Festival once."

Submitted by jasminemaryb

8. Puddle of crud

"At Sonisphere a group set up an awesome, muddy slip and slide. They were covered head to toe in "mud". The only problem was that the water was coming from an overflowing block of portaloos. They were clueless."

Submitted by Laurie Munro Gordon, Facebook

9. A labour of love

"On the last day of Download I was in the pouring rain watching Stone Temple Pilots when a guy stood in front of us and took a massive shit with his girlfriend holding his hand. That's love right there."

Submitted by vikinglondon

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10. The fun factory

"Seeing a girl poop through a wire fence. It was like a Play-Doh machine making shapes."

Submitted by Kat Brahms, Facebook

11. This shit is on fire

"On the last day of Reading 2008 a group of guys set fire to the portaloo block – because why wouldn't you want to make it smell worse? One was dancing on the roof, naked of course, and as the flames took hold and the roof collapsed he fell straight through into the sewage tank. He emerged five minutes later looking like a shit monster. It haunts me."

Submitted by Lia Turner, Facebook

12. Dead on arrival

"At Download in 2010 I saw someone passed out in a mud puddle at 2pm on the Wednesday. The campsite had only opened 2 hours ago."

Submitted by samb69

13. If the portaloo's a rocking don't come a knocking

"I was at Common People and two people went into the portaloo in front of me and proceed to have sex. However with the sheer power of their sex the door opened and all us people waiting in line saw much more than we ever wanted to. The worst thing was that they didn't even hesitate and carried on."

Submitted by megggxo

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14. Once you pop…

"I saw a man at V Festival shit into a Pringles can, filling it to the top, before hurling the tin and its contents across the campsite. It landed on a pretty, little pink tent."

Submitted by georgeb439b2f197

15. Just a phase

"At Leeds Festival, my friends and I were approached by a topless guy, streaked with blue paint, who was clearly off his tits. He then explained he'd run out of money and would let us pierce him anywhere on his body for a price. The torso was £2.50; the face £5; and £20 for the crown jewels."

Submitted by sarahl96

16. Politics

"At Reading in 2006/7, there were four guys dressed in Spitting Image get up as the Queen, Tony Blair, John Major, and Margaret Thatcher. They were all beating the shit out of each other next to a tent completely covered in pages from porn magazines."

Submitted by annaw42e953267

Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.

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