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12 Resolutions For College Seniors

You are on the final stretch to becoming a real adult, here are some resolutions to help you get there.

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1. To not drink a bottle of wine each night.

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Maybe use a glass as well...

2. To put some effort into your homework.

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3. Start drinking things that adults drink.


Boxed wine and Natty Light doesn't cover it anymore.

4. Stop procrastinating.

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I know your paper isn't due for another week, but maybe don't start it 8 hours before it is due.

5. Start looking for future employment.


Just the thought makes me cringe, actually.

6. Stop looking at your bank account so much.


It only makes you more depressed. We all prefer to live in denial.

7. But don't spend so much money at the bar.


$12 for a watered-down vodka soda should be illegal.

8. Stop napping as much.


When a power nap turns into a 3 hour nap...things need to change.

9. Realize you have to make cover letters and resumes.


What even is a cover letter, really?

10. Don't act superior.


Just because you are about to graduate in a few months doesn't mean you are suddenly a genius.

11. Stop drunk eating.


You'll just feel better about yourself the next day.

12. Actually make it to graduation.


C's don't always get degrees.

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