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We. Don't. All. Play. Basketball.
How you want to respond: Thanks for asking, Complete Stranger! Do you mind if I ask how much you weigh?
How you want to respond: No. I was totally lying to you earlier.
How you want to respond: Exactly the same as it is a foot below me where you are. Weather does not work like that.
How you want to respond: Maybe yes, maybe no, maybe why should I tell you my genealogy?
How you want to respond: Stop treating me like a second-class citizen.
How you want to respond: I have feet, so yes.
How you want to respond: She/He is exactly their height. What're the odds?
How you want to respond: Sure! Let's inconvenience two people right this minute to satisfy your curiosity.
How you want to respond: That's more of a command than a question, really. Also no.
How you want to respond: This was flattering the first time, but it got really old on the second through one-thousandth time.
How you want to respond: Didju shrink?
How you want to respond: Until The Man changes this vertically-inaccessible infrastructure, then yes. I lead a hard life.
How you want to respond: This is legitimately unfortunate for you, but seeing as I can't shrink on command there's nothing I can do. Deal with it.
How you want to respond: Not without driving my knees through my chest cavity I can't.
How you want to respond: Yes, but if I do this for you, you're forever indebted to me. Do you really need it that bad, Shrimpy?
How you want to respond: I climb up a beanstalk and browse the big and tall store in the clouds with all the other giants.
How you want to respond: With the fire of a thousand suns.