I feel like all of us have a secret or two that we've hidden from our parents. So when Reddit user 1quid_nurgget asked, "What is the biggest secret you've kept from your parents?", I wanted to know what family secrets are out there.
Now, I won't lie...a lot of these responses get VERY real, so if you read them, proceed with caution. But here are a few of the lighter ones that may make you chuckle, gasp, shake your head, or just a combo of all three:
1. This graduation secret:
"I recorded Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz over my sister's high school graduation video. It's been about 18 years, but I still feel bad."
2. This paternal secret that woulda had me asking my mama some questions:
"I met the guy my mom told me was my real father. We did a DNA test and there is a 0% chance he's my biological father. He even took me on a white-water-rafting trip with his wife and son. I’ve never told her."
3. This money secret:
"I make more money than I let on. My parents have and will always be the 'I take care of you all your life, time for you to pay it back' type of parent. Except there is no end to this 'debt.' So I hide money from them so they can't take advantage of me."
4. This job secret:
"I was a phone sex operator in University. I told everyone I took phone orders for The Bay (department store in Canada). One day my dad asked me if they were hiring. Nope. We were not."
5. This robbery secret:
"When I was at Walmart with my mom, I stole two of those big cartons full of Pokemon cards. I took the cards and stuffed them in my back pocket. I planned the whole thing a week before. I was the best robber at 9-years-old."
6. This porn secret that escalated quickly:
"When I was in the 7th grade, I started to get into porn. My favorite, for some reason, was guy on guy stuff even though I’m a girl. For some reason my mom took my phone and asked me about the porn she found on it. As soon as I started crying and saying I didn’t do it, she immediately believed me and blamed it on my step-dad, saying that she had a suspicion that he was gay through their whole relationship. After that she never confronted him and just continued to stay with him even though she thought he was gay and that’s when I realized my mom was a golddigger."
7. This laptop secret:
"Once I took my computer to IT and told them I didn't know why it stopped working out of nowhere. I actually DID know why my laptop wasn't working. I spilt a fair bit of alcohol on it."
8. This kinky secret:
"My parents don't know that I'm highly involved in the BDSM community in my city. I even attend a bar at our local fetish club a couple times a month. My fiancé and I are super vanilla passing. Which is lucky. They're happier not knowing."
9. This party secret:
"I used to sneak out of the house from our second-story bathroom window to go nightclubbing with my friends after my parents went to bed."
10. This escort secret:
"I pay escorts to show as my 'girlfriend' so that my parents would stop telling their friends to hook me up with their daughters. Every gathering the escorts show up, meet everyone, and always have to leave early. I pay by hour."
11. And lastly, this condom secret:
"When I was a child, I was in my parents drawers and opened them and saw (what I now know to be) condoms. I grabbed all the condoms and started making balloon animals. I was obsessed with making them as a kid so I thought they had bought me balloons. The worst part was that I was using the ones that were already used. My parents had a drawer specifically for used condoms. I hate myself for being so dumb."