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27 Things Jews Are Tired Of Hearing On Passover

Can't we all just agree that matzoh is actually not good?

1. "Happy Passover! Wait. Do you say 'Happy Passover'?"

2. "What's Passover about again?"

3. "So, is this the one where you fast?"

4. "Oh, it's the one where you can't have bread?"

5. "But you can have, like, everything else, right?"

More like NOTHING else.

6. "Wait, what can't you eat again?"

7. "And how long is it for?"

8. "Then you get eight days of presents, right? Like Hanukkah."

9. "Oh, well, that's not that hard. We have to give up something for Lent for 40 days."

10. "Don't you drink a lot of wine, though?"

11. "You're so lucky. You get to leave work early!"

I would rather be here.

12. "I love matzoh!"

13. "Can I have a piece of your matzoh?"

14. "Oh, it's the plain kind? The everything one is really good."

15. "Can I have a piece of your Bazooka gum?"

16. "I haven't had this in forever!"

17. "Ugh, the comic's in Hebrew?"

18. "What does it say?"

God knows. It has no vowels!

19. "You can't even read Hebrew?"

20. "You're leaving work early again?! But Dan's Jewish and he's not leaving."

21. "Why aren't you having any of Ali's birthday cake?"

22. "Want to go get pizza?"


23. "Wait, you can't have pizza?!"

24. "Why aren't you coming to after-work drinks?"

25. "Can I have a piece of your chocolate?"

26. "Ew. This tastes weird."


27. "What are you doing for Easter?"