17 Sweet Treats That I'm Convinced Everyone Else Is Just Pretending To Like

PSA: raisins do not belong in desserts.

Britain is responsible for some of the greatest desserts out there. Who doesn’t love a Victoria sponge cake or sticky toffee pudding?

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However, there are also a number of popular sweet treats that I think us Brits need to evaluate. Here are 22 of them.

1. Bread and butter pudding

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A moment of silence for anyone that has had to experience this dessert first hand – your tastebuds truly deserved better. I am not actually opposed to a bread/dessert hybrid, because who doesn’t love a piece of banana bread or a cinnamon roll? But slices of buttered bread covered in raisins and drenched in an eggy custard mixture is where I draw the line. 

2. Dolly mixture

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Dolly Mixture is proof that looks can be deceiving. These adorable pastel-coloured sweets look appetising, but they have an unpleasant aniseed aftertaste that leave me regretting my life choices. 

3. Fruit cake

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Who in their right mind would put raisins, currents, and sultanas in a cake? Dried fruit has absolutely no business being inside desserts and that is a hill I’m willing to die on.

4. Fig Rolls

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Fig paste takes centre stage in this dessert and it tastes about as good as it sounds... Unfortunately, not even the sweet biscuit exterior could save this pastry. 

5. Banoffee pie

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I think we can all agree that banoffee pie is not all it’s cracked up to be. Bananas, cream, caramel sauce, and biscuits are all wonderful individually, but mixed together? It's just a mushy mess. It’s true what they say, too many cooks spoil the broth and too many textures ruin the pie.  

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6. English trifle

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When are we going to stop pretending that English trifles are enjoyable? This is easily one of the sickliest desserts out there and I’m convinced that it’s impossible to consume more than a few spoonfuls in one sitting. 

7. Coconut chocolates.

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There is no feeling worse than sifting through a box of variety chocolate to find that there are only coconut ones left. It really is a pain like no other.

8. Pineapple upside-down cake

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Pineapple upside-down cakes are truly a sight to behold. They’re great to look at, but the textures are just all wrong. The wet, citrusy pineapple and dry sponge cake are sadly not a match made in heaven. Who wants a soggy dessert after all?

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9. Ice cream and Jelly

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What a way to ruin two perfectly good desserts! Some pairs are just meant to be, but I think it's time we admit that ice cream and jelly are certainlly not. 

10. Anything liquorice flavoured

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Liquorice is somehow sweet, sour, and sickly all at the same time. Any sweet that is also kind of bitter is not a sweet worth having in my opinion. 

11. Mince pies

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Now I don’t want to sound like the Grinch here, but mince pies are borderline offensive. The pastry itself is actually decent but we could do with a lot less of the “mincemeat” filling.

12. Rock candy

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All I can say is, good luck to you and your teeth if you decide to take on this candy. It's not worth the dentist bills.

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13. Eccles cake

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Again, why are Brits obsessed with putting dried fruit in desserts? I've bitten into too many of these tasty-looking pastries only to discover a sea of currents – it’s the worst kind of surprise. Currants have no place in society, let alone in our cakes, pies, or pastries. Whoever invented this clearly woke up and chose violence. 

14. Marshmallow teacakes

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One way to ruin tea time is to bring out a plate of these bad boys. The chocolatey exterior is palatable but the whole experience is ruined when you get a whole mouthful of sticky marshmallow fluff. It’s a no from me. 

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15. Christmas pudding

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The usual suspects are back once again… Clearly, we just can't get enough of raisins, currents, and sultanas and for the life of me, I can’t figure out why. I wouldn’t even wish this fruity cake-like dessert on my worst enemies. 

16. Digestives

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Digestives are arguably the least exciting biscuit to come from the UK. They lack flavour and are so incredibly dry that they’ll leave you parched. Sadly, not even a cup of tea can save this sweet treat.

17. Spotted dick

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Last and certainly least, spotted Dick. Trust me, it’s about as appetizing as it sounds...

What sweet treat do you think it's time we gave up? Tell us in the comments!