Attempting Inbox Zero As Told Through "Ninja Gaiden" GIFs

Cutting through my emails like katanas cut through warm butter.

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1. My epic journey began late last night after work, with an inbox bursting full of not-yet-answered emails, delayed tasks, and uncompleted drafts.

staring down my email inbox like http://t.co/PPPOnGpi0M

Isaac Fitzgerald@IsaacFitzgerald

staring down my email inbox like http://t.co/PPPOnGpi0M

9:18 PM - 26 Aug 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

2. But after only an hour of work, I had my inbox down to 25 emails and was really hitting my stride.

25 emails left got me like http://t.co/I2vgihz0tj

3. Sadly... pride cometh before the fall.

With 15 emails left, I was at the hot burning core of my ignored inbox. These were the emails that demanded the most from me. Work memos, event planning, that happy birthday e-card I'd been meaning to send my ma.

Last 15 emails looking out at me like http://t.co/kf8LXpEM2Q

Isaac Fitzgerald@IsaacFitzgerald

Last 15 emails looking out at me like http://t.co/kf8LXpEM2Q

11:05 PM - 26 Aug 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

4. Two whole hours passed and I only made it through five more emails. My inbox was winning.

Faltering with just 10 emails left my inbox's got me like http://t.co/cLyYp37AnL

Isaac Fitzgerald@IsaacFitzgerald

Faltering with just 10 emails left my inbox's got me like http://t.co/cLyYp37AnL

1:12 AM - 27 Aug 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

5. But wait! Encouragement came in the form of a co-worker who was also up wasting time on Twitter— I mean trying to go through work emails.

@IsaacFitzgerald this is a fucking twitter masterpiece BRAVO

alix@alixmcalpine

@IsaacFitzgerald this is a fucking twitter masterpiece BRAVO

1:14 AM - 27 Aug 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

6. Alas, I was too proud to accept my co-worker's kind words. The shame poured from my eyes.

@alixmcalpine Thanks, Alix, but with ten (now eleven because someone just wrote me) emails left I am no Ninja Gaiden. http://t.co/yrPZ2zoEWj

Isaac Fitzgerald@IsaacFitzgerald

@alixmcalpine Thanks, Alix, but with ten (now eleven because someone just wrote me) emails left I am no Ninja Gaiden. http://t.co/yrPZ2zoEWj

1:18 AM - 27 Aug 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

7. Sensing weakness, my co-worker revealed her nefarious intentions, exposing herself as an agent of my evil inbox.

@IsaacFitzgerald brb gonna write you so many emails

alix@alixmcalpine

@IsaacFitzgerald brb gonna write you so many emails

1:19 AM - 27 Aug 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

8. Thus perfectly ending the Ninja Gaiden Inbox Saga.

@alixmcalpine You... you have no idea how well you just completed this Ninja Gaiden Twitter Play, Alix. Goodnight... http://t.co/WTJ8pjceqP

Isaac Fitzgerald@IsaacFitzgerald

@alixmcalpine You... you have no idea how well you just completed this Ninja Gaiden Twitter Play, Alix. Goodnight... http://t.co/WTJ8pjceqP

1:23 AM - 27 Aug 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

9. In conclusion, stay on top of your work emails, folks.

10. When I left the office, I discovered that my bike handles had been stolen.

Looked at the air where my stolen bike handles should be & then at the low # of emails in my inbox & muttered "worth it" as I hailed a cab..

Isaac Fitzgerald@IsaacFitzgerald

Looked at the air where my stolen bike handles should be & then at the low # of emails in my inbox & muttered "worth it" as I hailed a cab..

1:49 AM - 27 Aug 14ReplyRetweetFavorite