Blair Waldorf is the ultimate in elite parties thrown at the Hamptons, sponsored by Vitamin Water, with Tinsley Mortimer wandering aimlessly. Just like The League she decides who gets let into her inner circle through a pre-screening process. She hates finance bros, but she'll put up with one if he's wealthy enough.
Jenny Humphrey with her smoky eye and constant sobbing and screwing up is awfully reminiscent of the dudes who won't stop badgering you on Tinder when you don't respond favorably to "come sit on my face" or lash out at you for writing a Vanity Fair article.
Black People Meet
Ah, Raina Thorpe. She showed up during Black History Month and vanished soon after, so what other site is she even meant for, really?
Nate Archibald is the Upper East Side's original #Masc4Masc, so of course he's Grindr. He's white, fit, sexy, and wants you to look at his abs, not his eyes when he's talking to you.
Georgina Sparks is the ultimate bad bitch. She keeps men under her thumb and basics in check. Which is why she's Bumble, where guys can only chat if you want them to. Georgina don't play.
How About We
Vanessa Abrams is constantly up in other people's business, telling other people's business, and making you watch her damn student films. So she's perfect for How About We where you have to wade through people's long-ass ideas of what their perfect date is.
Erik van der Woodsen has a sweet, innocent heart, but sometimes he screws up and picks bad people. He's basically living out your basic OK Cupid date life. Dates! How old fashioned.
Plenty of Fish
Serena van der Woodsen is a messy kween. When she's not drunk, having affairs, or waking up in crashed cars and motel rooms, she's looking for love in all the wrong places. Which is why Plenty of Fish, the Craigslist ad of apps, is basically her.
Oh there daddy daddy. Rufus Humphrey is everyone's favorite waffle-making dad. For people who like an older man with a bit of hair on his chest like Rufus, you'll definitely want to use Scruff.
Gossip Girl herself, Dan Humphrey, is the psycho who's been stalking everyone for years and keeping track of their every move. He's basically Hinge, which allows people to background check you by getting information from your mutual friends. An app that runs on snitches, just like Gossip Girl. XOXO.
Jack Bass is hot AF and looks like you'll give it to you all night. As Jack'd he's sexy and fit, but a less homogenous version than Grindr, and he doesn't discriminate when it comes to what you look like or where you're from. Jack is just horny.
Dorota Kishlovsky is the ultimate matchmaker and she found true love with Vanya, so what else would she be besides Match.com?
From Chuck Bass' sleazy intro in the pilot, to nights at Victor Victrola, to his multitude of affairs, he's def the IRL version of Ashley Madison, the site that helps people cheat on their spouses.