Skip To Content
    Dec 22, 2014

    18 Rules Of Having A Threesome According To Nancy Drew & The Hardy Boys

    Got 180 pages and I'm caught in between.

    1. Acquaintances are often the best option, friends can ruin relationships and complete strangers might be too weird.

    Simon Pulse

    2. If you're not into one of the people who proposed the threesome, say no up front. Immediately.

    Simon Pulse

    3. Get everything on the table before you decide to have one, don't go in hiding long-harbored feelings for someone.

    Simon Pulse

    4. There's an extra body involved, so make sure everyone gets tested.

    Simon Pulse

    5. Getting high might sound like a good idea, but make sure you can focus on the task at hand.

    Simon Pulse

    6. Two penises coming at you at once can be startling at first, but handle it like a bad bitch.

    Simon Pulse

    7. There will be a LOT of semen flying. Twice as much. Be prepared.

    Simon Pulse

    8. Try having the encounter in a place you don't usually have sex, so you don't compare the situation to your regular sex life.

    Simon Pulse

    9. If someone ends up being a "minute man," then that's too bad, the threesome is a twosome now.

    Simon Pulse

    10. Sometimes it can be fun to sit back and watch the show for a bit.

    Simon Pulse

    11. Explore all the possible entries for pleasure.

    Simon Pulse

    12. If you say, "Oh my God, it's so big!" to one person, you have to say it to the other. Don't be rude.

    Simon Pulse

    13. Conversely, don't shame another partner for their less than stellar attributes.

    Simon Pulse

    14. Pay attention to both partners, otherwise the jilted party may start drama.

    Simon Pulse

    15. Yes, there's three people, but don't go OVERBOARD on the lube.

    Simon Pulse

    16. Set up rules about the other two parties having future sex on their own.

    Simon Pulse

    17. Once it's over, don't be a fucking third wheel.

    Simon Pulse

    18. When you end up with crabs, it's harder to surmise who's the fucking culprit.

    Simon Pulse

    Want great book recommendations in your inbox every week? Sign up for the BuzzFeed Books newsletter!

    Newsletter signup form