19 Things Scottish People Miss When They Move To London
Just because Irn-Bru is widely available now doesn't make it the same, OK?
1. Chip sauce.
You'd give your right arm for a Scotch pie supper doused in salt 'n' sauce. You'd probably give your left arm too, but then you wouldn't have anything to shovel it into your face with.
2. All that wonderful space.
Not another human being in sight. *triple air punch*
3. The weather.
Your new local garage sells out of bread and milk as soon as there's any mention of bad weather, but at home, we'd just call it a shower.
4. Hogmanay.
Because there ain't no New Year party until you've brought in the bells with Jackie Bird.
5. National holidays.
Whilst we're on the topic of Hogmanay, what's with England just having the one day off after New Year?
6. A good, no-nonsense attitude.
Andy Murray's not miserable, he's just Scottish.
7. People actually understanding where you come from.
Being able to give a place name, as opposed to "the sticky outie bit on the bottom-left-hand side of the map" and have someone know where it is = the best.
8. Obscure childhood references.
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"You Cannae Shove Your Granny off a Bus" from The Singing Kettle must be a contender for the greatest children's song of all time.
9. Sporting hope.
Yes, we know we haven't beaten England at rugby for ages, but that doesn't mean we're going to stop believing that we can.
10. The language.
And absolutely losing it when someone uses the word "jobby", because they don't know what it *really* means.
11. People calling you "hen".
It should be annoying, but secretly you love it.
12. Ceilidhs.
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Why aren't these more of a thing? All that time you spent doing Strip the Willow at school Burns Night dances has gone to waste.
13. The cost of living.
It's OK, I'm totally cool with the fact that the rent on my one-bedroom flat could get me a three-bed house at home. *weeps while looking out the window at landlord's Range Rover*
14. People understanding your name.
IT'S IONA, NOT LONA, HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW THE ALPHABET?!
15. The food.
You can't find a macaroni pie, haggis panini, or a tattie scone for love nor money.
16. Bagpipes.
You won't notice it until you hear a pipe band strike up at some sort of parade, but when they do, you'll be all, "I'm not crying, just got something in my eye."
17. The people.
Specifically, how friendly everyone is.
18. The TV shows.
OK, so Still Game hasn’t been on TV for years, but when you’re feeling homesick, a bit of Jack and Victor will cheer you right up. TWO PINTS, PRICK!
19. Not having to answer stupid questions.
No, we don't have different passports. And yes, we do have both Wi-Fi and electricity.
But it's all worth it for that feeling you get when you cross the border again.
Slàinte!