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What English People Say Vs What Scottish People Say

Be more honest. Be more direct. Be more Scottish.

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1. When you're on a crowded train.

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English people say: "Excuse me, would you mind terribly moving down a bit?"

Scottish people say: "Awrite pal, gonnae shift doon? Ye cannae fit a quart into a pint pot."

4. When you're nervous before an important meeting at work.

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English people say: "I'm worried about this meeting I have at work next week."

Scottish people say: "A'm feart this meetin's gonnae go doon the pan. Shiten' masel!"

5. When your mate's just passed their driving test.

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English people say: "You've passed your driving test? That's great! Well done you!"

Scottish people say: "GAUN YERSEL' HEN!"

6. When you've just been to a kinda gross restaurant.

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English people say: "I wouldn't recommend that restaurant, it was filthy."

Scottish people say: "You'd have to pay me to eat at that shit hole again, it was a right clatty midden!"

9. When you're describing a unit of measurement.

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English people say: "Yikes, that cyclist only missed me by a few inches!"

Scottish people say: "Oi, ya bastart, gonnae watch where you're going? You missed me by a bawhair."

10. When you need to say "hi".

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English people say: "Hi!"

Scottish people say: "Awrite bawbags!"

13. When someone's just lost their temper.

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English people say: "He seemed a tad upset."

Scottish people say: "A dinnae ken whit happened, one minute he's fine and the next he took a pure maddy and went aff his heid."

14. When you're trying to tell someone it's fine.

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English people say: "That's OK!"

Scottish people say: "Nae danger pal!"

15. When you're commiserating your friend.

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English people say: "You didn't get that job you applied for? That's a shame."

Scottish people say: "Those bastarts never gave you the job? Aw man, that's totally shan."

16. When you're remarking on someone's weight loss.

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English people say: "You look great, have you lost weight?"

Scottish people say: "Are ye no eating right? Ye dinnae hae enough room inside ye for a rheumatic pain."

18. When you doubt the truth of someone's story.

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English people say: "Are you absolutely sure that's correct?"

Scottish people say: "Aye, right," *rolls eyes*

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